


Runaways

by castielfranta



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Castiel and Dean Winchester are Teenagers, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-03
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-03-28 22:30:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 37,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3872152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castielfranta/pseuds/castielfranta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(A Supernatural High School AU)</p><p>Castiel Novak spends his life hiding in the shadows of the people around him. When a new student named Dean Winchester moves to Lawrence, his life is never the same.</p><p>Once the two boys are ridiculed and faced with homophobia from the people around them, they decided to run away to the safety of one of the Winchester's family friends, Bobby Singer. When Bobby disappears one afternoon, they must rescue him with the help of someone neither boy unexpected to work with...</p><p>In the midst of the peril they face while trying to save their friend, they receive a letter from Cas' mother. It is then revealed that Cas and Dean aren't meant to be here in this universe and that there is a whole other world that they are meant to be prospering in. But what will they have to sacrifice to get back?</p><p>A lot can happen when you decide to run away.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Castiel, Dean, and Sam are not aware that John and Bobby are hunters, nor do they know that such creatures exist.
> 
> (I originally posted this on Wattpad, but there aren't many people from the Supernatural fandom who write fanfic there. As my one-shot was very successful, I decided to give it a try and see how it would do here. Here is the original link: http://www.wattpad.com/story/38021205-runaways)

             The sky was a deep turquoise that morning, just like Castiel Novak’s eyes. He gazed above him and sighed. It was a day just like any other in Lawrence. Castiel (or Cas for short) peered out of the window of his father’s maroon Honda Accord. He was dreading another Wednesday of high school. It was hell for Cas, who was teased by many of the “cool” guys in his grade. Being a freshman wasn’t the easiest for him, even though he had lived in Lawrence his whole life.

            “Don’t worry, Cas,” Chuck, Cas’ father, spoke reassuringly. “You come home every day and you’re just fine.”

  
            But what Chuck didn’t know was that every day while he sat in his office working on his next novel, Cas was locked in his room dreading another day of school.

            As his school gradually came into view, Cas held his breath. He could feel the anxiety starting to take over. Chuck pulled up to the curb and unlocked the car door. “You’ll be fine, Cas,” Chuck promised.

            Cas offered a weak grin in response, slinging his backpack over his shoulders before stepping out the door.

 

* * *

 

            Cas pulled his chair out and sat down. He flipped his book to where he left off and tuned everyone out

            A familiar smooth gait caught his attention, making goose bumps prickle his skin. He closed his eyes and braced himself for what was about to go down.

            A big, fat hand smacked the cover of his book shut. “Hey, Cat, whatcha readin’ there?”

            He winched. “It’s _Cas_.”

            “Whatever.”

            Cole was the toughest freshman at Roosevelt High and had spent the whole school year torturing Cas.

            Cas went to open his book again, but Cole pressed the cover back down.

            “I’m not finished, Cat. You finish my math homework?”

            Cas sighed, pulling a sheet of notebook paper out of his binder.

            Cole smirked. “Great, Cat. Better be an ‘A’.” He pushed his way back to his desk and sat down.

            Cas took a deep breath and pulled out his notebook. He wrote the date in the right hand corner when he caught sudden movement from the corner of his eye.

            A tall boy stepped into the room. His hair was brown and cut rather short. He had a blue plaid shirt layered over a gray t-shirt and dark jeans. Cas let his eyes linger for a few seconds before the boy turned to meet his gaze. Cas felt his face heat up nervously and looked down at his notebook. The boy’s eyes were green.

            The boy made his way over to the front of the room and handed a slip of paper to the science teacher, Mrs. Edwards.

 

            “Class,” Mrs. Edwards began as the class brought their attention curiously to the front of the room. “This is Dean Winchester. He will be in our class from now on. Please make him feel welcome.”

            Dean strolled over to an empty seat in front of Cas and sighed. He didn’t seem very nervous, but neither was Cas on his very first day.

            He was terrified.

            He spent the whole hour glancing over at Dean’s seat and found it hard to concentrate on what Mrs. Edwards was saying. Something about him intrigued Cas, who wasn’t the type of person to be strung along by curiosity.

            Cas was drawn away by his thoughts when the bell chimed, signaling the end of class. He looked down at his paper and realized that he hadn’t taken as many notes as he should have. He would have to get them from his brother, Gabe, later.

            He collected his things and emerged into the hallway. The chaos was almost overwhelming to Cas, who had mild anxiety. He had learned to control it over the past few years, but it always managed to get out of control at times.

            He went to a few classes (social studies and creative writing) before making his way to gym class. It was his least favorite class of the day and found himself dreading it from the moment he left third period.

            He wearily stepped into the locker room and walked over to a row of lockers. He entered his combination and changed into his gym clothes. Today they would be running on the track. Cas sighed.

            Suddenly, he spotted familiar movement from the corner of his eye and lifted his gaze. His eyes met Dean Winchester’s, off all people. Cas took a shallow, nervous breath and snapped his head over to his own locker.

            Once the moment passed, Cas sat down on one of the benches and waited for Coach Drews to come and take role. Cas couldn’t help but sneak glances over at Dean, taking note of the tiny freckles dotting his cheeks. His eyes were a vibrant green and his hair was light brown.

            Cas must not have noticed how long he had been staring until Dean looked up and caught his gaze. Cas widened his eyes. Embarrassed, he bit his lip and turned away.

            He could have sworn he saw Dean smile slightly, but it could have just been his imagination.

            Once everyone was accounted for, the boys all made their way out the door and onto the track. Cas fell behind in the group and found himself at the very back. Well, not the _very_ back.

            “Damn. It’s my first day and we have to run a mile.”

            Cas felt his muscles tense and a lump formed in his throat when we turned to his right. Dean.

            “Um…yeah. It really does,” Cas agreed. He could feel his face start to get hot. Perhaps it was because the sun was beating down on them?

            “I’m Dean, by the way,” he grinned. “Dean Winchester.”

            Damn, that grin made Cas blush every time.

            It took Cas a minute to process what was happening. Dean raised his eyebrows and Cas shook his head slightly in amusement.

            “Castiel Novak,” he replied.

             “I’m going to call you Cas.”

            He chuckled. “That’s what my friends call me, so sure.”

            “Does that make me, Dean Winchester, your friend, Castiel Novak?”

            Cas couldn’t help but feel the corners of his mouth slowly creep upwards. “I suppose it does.”

            As they chatted, Cas felt his brain become crowded with thoughts and questions he was too nervous and awkward to ask. Finally, he gained the courage. “How is your first day going?”

            Dean huffed and shook his head. “Alright. I’ve gotten lost and it’s been a hell of a day so far, to say the least,” he sighed.

            “I can imagine,” Cas nodded.

            That was the moment when Cas realized his life would never be the same.

* * *

 

 

            It was so easy to talk to Dean. Although he was somewhat temperamental at times, Cas couldn’t help but want to stay with him for hours on end. Dean was a well-traveled guy; he had been all over the country with his father, who was a mechanic, and his brother, Sam. It turns out their mother passed away when he was four.

            “It feels weird to be back in Lawrence where she died,” Dean admitted one afternoon. He was beginning to trust Cas more and more with each day, and Cas certainly noticed this. He also noticed the way Dean’s eyes lit up when he turned on the radio to find some classic rock and narrowed his eyes when someone or something angered him.

            In fact, Dean wasn’t very pleasant to be around when he was angry and easily became agitated. Cas hadn’t realized this until one day about two weeks after they had met when Cole was being, well, Cole.

            Cas was seated in Science class, just like usual, when Dean stepped through the door. He set his things down on his desk next to Cas, which he had started doing a few days after they met in gym class.

            Cas was no longer shy and reserved when Dean was around. Something about this boy made Cas break out of his shell. During the classes that he didn’t have with Dean, he was back to his quiet, lonely self, just like he was before Dean Winchester came into his life.

            “Are you trying out for any sports teams this year?” Cas asked curiously. Dean seemed like the type of guy who would go out for something like football or wrestling.

            Dean shrugged. “I haven’t decided. I’m guessing you aren’t?”

            Cas chucked. “You know me so well.”

            Dean went back to his locker to grab something. They only had a few minutes before class started.

            Of course now that Cas was finally happy for the first time in a very long time, the world just had to come around and twist his day.

            Cole stepped into the classroom, his eyes darting around the room mischievously. They lit up when they landed on the boy sitting alone in the back of the room. Cas hadn’t even realized Cole had entered the room, stealthily making his way over to the empty desk next to Cas.

            “Hey Cat,” Cole sneered.

            Cas whipped his head to face him. His eyes widened in fear.

            “How’s things with your little friend going?” Cole taunted once more.

            “Fine. Just fine.”

            “Because people talk. Especially girls,” he chuckled, a sly grin creeping his way up his face. “And they have their eyes on Dean. I figured you would want to know.”

            Cas narrowed his eyes and felt his face begin to heat up. “Why would I want to know?”

            Cole raised his eyebrows in amusement. “You know exactly why.”

            Cas felt his heart sink because he knew exactly what Cole was talking about.

            Ever since Dean had arrived, Cas couldn’t keep his eyes off him. When they spoke, Cas studied the way Dean’s nose curved at the tip and the sharpness of the edge of his jawline. When they ran the track, he noticed the ripples of movement in Dean’s shoulders from under his gym shirt. Cas observed the way his tiny freckles dotted his cheeks and how his eyes contained tiny brown specks…

            But Cas was sure he wasn’t gay. Sure, he looked at Dean a lot and his cheeks turned bright red when they touched even the slightest bit, but that didn’t make him gay. Even though he found himself sneaking glances at Dean’s soft, pink lips when he spoke, that didn’t make him gay. When Dean walked into the room and made Cas’ heart leap in his chest…

            He was tired of lying to himself. Castiel Novak was gay.

            But how Cole had found out about this was a mystery to Cas.

            Cas wasn’t sure if Dean even was gay. He had talked about how he had dated many girls in the past, but it just never worked out.

            “Maybe it’s because I flirted with their friends a few times,” Dean chuckled one day during gym. For the rest of the day, Cas tried to imagine Dean kissing some random girl Cas didn’t even know and it made a burning sensation rise in his chest. Jealousy.

            But when he fantasized about the moment he got to press his lips against Dean’s and feel his warm hands against him, everything felt right to Cas.

            “I’m not gay,” Cas lied, trying his best to sound determined.

            “Admit it,” Cole spat. Cas flinched.

            “What did you just say?” a voice called from behind.

            Cas turned around to face Dean, who had walked back in the door at the perfect moment. He narrowed his eyes and stormed past everyone crowding around the door. “I asked you a question,” he raised his voice and spat through gritted teeth.

            “I—nothing,” Cole stated, obviously not telling the truth.

            “Get the hell out of my way or I swear I will bust your brains out,” he threatened, pointing his forefinger.

            Cole hesitated before stepping out of his seat. “This isn’t over,” he muttered, taking heavy steps over to his seat.

            Cas felt his jaw drop. Had Dean really just stood up to Cole?

            Dean slid into his seat and let out a heavy sigh.

            “Thank you, Dean,” Cas managed to mumble in shock.

            “Anytime, Cas.”

 

* * *

 

 

            “What did Cole even want, anyway?” Dean asked Cas with curiosity as they slipped out of the school’s big double doors. Cas was relieved that Dean hadn’t asked about the incident all day, but the relief flooded away in an instant.

            “Nothing,” Cas mumbled.

            Dean stopped in his tracks in the middle of the sidewalk. “Cas, do you not trust me?” He raised his eyebrows and pressed his lips together.

            Cas sighed. “I—yes, Dean. I trust you more than I trust anyone else.”

            That made the corners of Dean’s mouth curl up slightly, but the expression faded away. “Then what happened?”

            “Cole isn’t worth worrying about.”

            “Cas…” Dean took a few steps forward and lowered his voice. “How long has he been doing this?”

            “Doing what?”

            “Being a complete asshole towards you,” Dean scoffed. “Did something happen that caused all this?”

            Cas shook his head.

            “The next time he does anything, and I mean anything, I promise I’ll do something. I swear I will,” Dean reassured him. His hand brushed against Cas’ fingers accidentally. Which was completely logical, since they were standing so close.  It’s not like Dean Winchester purposely wanted to feel the ridges of his knuckles and the warmth of Castiel Novak’s hands.

            Dean kept his promise. The next day when Cas showed up for science and Cole went over there to tease him, Dean was there to shove him away. When Cole tried to trip Cas in the hall, Dean was there to pull him out of the way. A few hours later when Cole took Cas’ notebook, Dean snatched it right back.

            Cas always felt his stomach lurch when Dean came to rescue him. Nothing felt better than having his own guardian angel.

            But Dean couldn’t always be there.


	2. Two

 

            Unfortunately, Dean wasn’t always there when Cas needed him to come to the rescue.

            A few days later, Cas was rushing to his creative writing class in fear of being late, but he was stopped by a group of girls.

            “So, is it true?” one of them asked. “Did you really kiss Dean?”

            Cas raised his eyebrows. He began to panic, unsure of what to say. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He hadn’t actually kissed Dean, so Cas was very confused.

            “Because everyone is talking about this new kid, Dean, and you’re always with him. You’re always clinging to his side. And someone claims they saw you two kiss.”

            One of the girls next to her made a disgusted face. “I thought Dean was really cool and hot, but now he’s, you know, _gay_ …” She said the word with such disgust that Cas winced, unsure of what to say to her. “Like you.”

            “It’s not true,” Cas muttered, pushing past them. He could feel his breathing start to accelerate, his heart, as crushed as it was, felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. He was sure he was going to puke.

            He slid into the bathroom as the bell rang, crouched over the toilet. Cas could feel tears streaming down his face and dripping onto his shirt. He had ruined Dean’s reputation and now everyone knew that Cas was gay. But who had even started the rumor?

            He let himself sob for a while until he heard the bathroom door open. Cas hushed himself and tried to keep his breathing steady, hoping to not be noticed.

            “Cas?”

            His eyes widened.

            “I know you’re in here,” the voice called again.

            Cas gulped. “Dean?”

            “Yup. You can come on out,” Dean reassured him in a soft, patient voice.

            Cas took a deep breath. He wiped his tears and stepped out.

            Dean’s grin, despite it being small, fell in an instant. “Oh Cas…” He walked over to him and placed his hands on Cas’ shoulders, then let them slide over his back. Dean pulled him forward into a hug, which triggered more tears from Cas.

            “I’m so done with this school,” Cas croaked after explaining what had just happened.

            Dean pulled away so he could meet Cas’ gaze. “Hey, cheer up,” he told him, wiping a single tear from Cas’ cheek. “Let them think whatever the hell they want to think. They could say I’m a drug dealing circus clown and I still wouldn’t care what they thought. One day, this won’t matter. High school will be just one blur.”

            Cas nodded, sniffling a bit.

            “Do you ever wish you could just…run away? Do you ever get the urge to hop over that stupid fence and leave and never come back?”

            Cas sighed. “You have no idea.”

            “I feel that way every day. But the only thing keeping me here is you.”

            Cas widened his eyes in surprise. “Me?”

            Dean smiled. “You’re the only person I can truly trust. All those other people here, I know they are fake people with phony smiles and words that have no meaning. So I don’t trust them. But you…” He traced his fingers along Cas’ shoulder.

            Cas had no words to say, but the expression on his face spoke a million of them. He could feel himself falling in love with Dean more and more as the day passed. But the real question was…how did Dean feel?

            They skipped class together for the rest of the hour, hiding in one of the larger stalls. The two sat against the wall with their legs extended in front of them.

            “Do you still want to talk about it?” Dean offered.

            Cas shrugged. “What is there left to say?”

            “We can still leave,” Dean suggested. “The only thing keeping me now is...Sammy. And my dad…”

            “I forgot all about my dad,” Cas sighed. “Why does leaving have to be so complicated?”

            Dean shrugged. “I could probably make it out there on my own, but it would be lonely without my best friend.”

            “That’s why you’ll have me,” Cas chimed in with a little bit of excitement.

            Dean felt a grin slide up his lips. “That’s why I’ll have you.”

            Cas leaned his head against Dean’s shoulder. They stayed like that for the rest of the hour talking until the bell rang.

 

* * *

 

            The next day in gym class, Cas and Dean decided to walk around the track together. Cas fought the urge to slide his fingers over Dean’s and feel his touch once more.

  Falling for Dean was like a drug to Cas. Ever since their chat in the bathroom the day before, Cas was longing to have his hands clasped around Dean’s and kiss every inch of him. Only seeing each other during school made that hard, so his plan was to invite Dean to hang out at his house.

Dean was gazing over at the fence, a longing look plastered on his face.

“I’m guessing you still want to leave?” Cas suggested.

“Yup,” Dean sighed, glancing over at Cas. His eyes were even more beautiful with the harsh sunlight beating down around him. Cas’ hand brushed against Dean’s slightly, making chills run up his spine.

Cas took a deep breath. “Do you want to maybe, well I don’t know, um, come over after school today?”

Dean grinned. “Sure.”

Cas let out a sigh of relief.

“Has Cole been giving you any more trouble lately?” Dean inquired.

“Nothing you haven’t already witnessed today,” Cas groaned.

“I wish he would just leave you alone.”

Cas chuckled. “If only…”

His eyes trailed the fence with curiosity. It wouldn’t be that hard to Cas to drop everything and leave with Dean. He had already thought about what he would need to pack while he was laying in bed trying to fall asleep the night before.

Cas looked down at his feet and sighed. Running away with Dean was what Cas really wanted, but Dean had a family who truly cared about him. Sam would be without a brother. How would it feel to have your brother leave you all alone with your practically nonexistent father?

Cas was so deep in thought that he hadn't realized that someone's gaze had been fixed on him for an extended amount of time. He looked up to see Dean smiling down at Cas.

"What?" he asked.

"Oh, nothing," Dean mumbled.

Cas bumped into Dean and gasped slightly when he felt his touch. Dean let his forefinger trail along Cas’ hand. It curled around his fingers until both of their hands were clasped together. Cas could feel his heart throb in his chest as Dean laced their fingers and squeezed gently. Cas squeezed back, feeling his cheeks heat up as he realized everyone’s gaze was focused on the two boys holding hands on the track.

“Dean,” Cas muttered. “Everyone is staring…”

Dean leaned over to Cas’ ear.

“Then let them stare.”

 

* * *

 

Cas wasn’t sure if holding hands with Dean was a mistake or not.

For the rest of the day, people were approaching the two and harassing them with questions and comments, which were mostly homophobic. Cas never knew what to do or say, but Dean always came up with something cleaver.

“Dean,” Cas whined. “Everyone is staring again.” He wasn’t enjoying any of the attention they were receiving.

“It’ll be okay, Cas. I promise.”

Cas and Dean hadn’t admitted their feelings for each other, but they were definitely implied. Cas wasn’t sure when or how he was going to tell Dean, but he was longing to. He was waiting for the perfect moment to express his feelings or even just kiss him. When Cas thought of kissing Dean, he couldn’t help but blush and smile sheepishly.

Cas was relieved when school finally ended. The two kept a steady pace along the sidewalk as they headed to Cas’ house. He was nervous to bring Dean home. Chuck had a meeting in Emporia that day, so hopefully they would have the house to themselves and not have Cas’ father prodding at them with countless questions.

“What’s your dad like?” Dean asked curiously. He brushed his fingers along Cas’ hand.

“He’s an unorganized writer and a bit of an alcoholic, but he’s still a great dad,” he explained. “I never really knew my mom, but I have a lot of brothers and sisters. They all live with her, though, so it’s just my dad and I.”

Dean nodded. “It’s hard not having a mom around.”

Cas sighed. “Yeah…”

The walk wasn’t too unbearable for the two, especially since they had each other for company.

Cas loved talking to Dean. It gave him a chance to study the subtle features of his face. There were a lot of things he had noticed about Dean by simply watching him as he spoke. His eyebrows rose when he enjoyed something and his eyes narrowed when something angered him. His gaze stiffened on someone when he was about to defend Cas. His gaze always softened when he spoke with Cas and his laugh lit a spark in Cas’ heart.

Once they reached his house, Cas unlocked the door and Dean stepped inside. Cas took a right and opened the door to his room. He was fairly nervous to show Dean his room for some reason. He had managed to tear down old posters from his walls once eighth grade ended and he was officially a freshman. Chuck insisted on keeping them, but Cas figured it was time for them to go.

Dean strolled inside, his eyes examining the walls and trinkets lined up along Cas’ bookshelf. It had been a while since Cas had brought a friend over and had never brought home someone he actually had a crush on, so he wasn’t sure what to say or do. Instead, he sat on his bed and let his gaze drift over to Dean. He was amusing to watch when he was curious.

“You have a lot of books,” Dean mumbled as he turned around to face Cas.

“Well, I do like to read,” Cas admitted.

“Obviously.”

Cas opened the lid to his laptop, but shut it immediately.

“What? Were you looking at porn or something?” Dean chuckled.

“What? No. I was just…writing,” Cas mumbled.

Dean raised an eyebrow with amusement. “You didn’t mention you liked to write.”

“I told you about my creative writing class.”

“But I didn’t know you actually…you know, wrote.”

Cas shrugged. “It’s relaxing.”

“Can I read something?” Dean asked.

“I don’t know…” Cas mumbled.

“Please?” Dean whined, playfully sticking out his bottom lip. Cas fought the urge to kiss him right then and there, but he handed him his laptop instead.

Dean opened the lid and scrolled to the very top of the document. “What’s this one about?”

Cas could feel his face heating up. “It’s about a boy who’s new to school and doesn’t have many friends.”

“Have you been writing about me?” Dean smirked.

“What? No!”

He laughed. “I’m joking, Cas.” He looked down at the screen and started reading with a serious expression on his face. It took him a few minutes to read what Cas had written so far. Once he finished, he looked up with wide eyes. “That’s amazing, Cas. Why didn’t you ever tell me you liked to write?”

Cas was sure his face was bright red by now. “I was too embarrassed.”

“It’s amazing, “ Dean repeated, handing the laptop back to Cas, who was now smiling sheepishly.

“What do you want to do now?” Cas asked, setting his laptop back on his desk.

Dean shrugged. “I guess we can watch a movie?”

Cas nodded and led the way to the living room. Dean sit down and started flipping through all the DVD’s they had. When he didn’t find anything, he decided to look and see if there was anything on Netflix. Meanwhile, Cas stuck a bag of popcorn inside the microwave.

“How about we start a new TV show? All these movies look terrible,” Dean thought aloud.

“That’s fine with me,” Cas shrugged.

Dean scrolled silently for a moment. “What about Scrubs?”

Cas raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that a doctor show?”

“Well, yeah, but it looks interesting,” Dean suggested.

The microwave beeped and Cas took the popcorn out. He poured it into a bowl and set it down on the coffee table. He was about to sit down, but stopped abruptly. How close should he sit with Dean? Should he be on the other side of the couch? The middle? Curled up right next to him? Being at a movie theater would have been much easier. He ended up sitting right next to Dean, but not so close that they were touching. He was a little confused for part of the first episode, but he quickly caught on.

About half way through, Cas could tell that Dean was a little tense. Were they sitting too close? Were they sitting too far? Did the popcorn taste bad?

A few moments later, Dean lifted his arm slowly and brought it around Cas and rested it on his shoulder so that his arm was around him. Cas felt himself tense up nervously. Their gazes met and Dean had an expression that seemed to ask, “Is this okay?” In response, Cas rested his head on Dean’s shoulder.

Eventually, Cas brought his legs up onto the couch and Dean pulled him closer. Something about being curled up with Dean made Cas feel…safe and protected. He felt like nothing could hurt him if Dean was around.

After they had watched a few episodes, Cas found it nearly impossible to keep his eyes open. It had been a long week and eventful day. Luckily, he had the whole weekend to relax…and get closer to Dean. He finally stopped fighting sleep and let himself drift away in Dean’s arms.

When he woke, his head was in Dean’s lap. Cas’ hair was messy and he assumed that Dean had been running his fingers through it while he was asleep. He looked over at the clock, which read 10:43. He saw that he had gotten a text from Chuck a few minutes ago. That must have been what had woken him up. His meeting lasted a bit longer than expected, so he planned on spending the night in a hotel.

At some point, Dean had turned off the TV. Cas didn’t want to wake him, but sleeping on the couch probably wasn’t very comfortable. “Dean?” he whispered.

Dean’s eyes fluttered open. “Yeah?”

“Are you going to stay? It’s almost eleven.”

He took a moment to adjust his eyes before checking the time on his phone. “I texted my dad earlier…I hope you don’t mind.”

Cas grinned. “I don’t. My dad is staying in Emporia tonight.”

Dean nodded. By now they were both sitting up. “Do you want to sleep in here?” Cas offered.

“That’s fine with me,” Dean shrugged.

Cas drowsily headed over to his room and grabbed a pillow and blanket for him. He set the pillow against the armrest and draped the blanket over him.

“Thanks Cas,” he whispered, offering a sleepy smile.

“Anytime, Dean,” Cas grinned.

Cas headed back to his room and found it hard to fall asleep. The idea of Dean Winchester, the boy he was falling in love with, sleeping in the other room made Cas nervous and excited all at the same time. He fell asleep for about an hour before waking up again.

He looked up to see Dean standing at the entrance of his door. “Cas?” he called.

Cas sat up, still half asleep. “Yeah?”

“This might sound really stupid,” Dean mumbled. “But I had a bad dream.”

Cas frowned. “I’m sorry, Dean.”

“Can I stay here? With you?”

Cas slid over and Dean crawled into bed beside him. Once they were in a comfortable position, Cas brought his arm around Dean and pulled him close. He heard Dean sigh, which made Cas break out into a grin. He buried his face in Dean’s neck.

Cas never wanted to let go.


	3. Three

            Light filtered through the trees, leaving a bright yellow hue in Cas’ room. His eyes fluttered open and saw that the blankets on his bed were tangled in disarray. Cas let his gaze travel over to the clock on his nightstand and saw that it was 9:26.

            It took a moment for him to remember the events of the day before. Just merely thinking about what happened made Cas smile uncontrollably.

            He rolled back over onto his side and faced Dean, who was barely stirring from his slumber. “Good morning,” Cas mumbled drowsily.

            Dean pulled the covers back over him. “How did you sleep?”

            “Great,” he replied, resting his head under Dean’s chin. Cas sighed into his chest as Dean pulled him closer. He could hear the rhythmic pounding of Dean’s heart and his steady breathing. All Cas wanted was to stay there with Dean curled up in bed, but hunger began to gnaw at his stomach.

            They stayed like that for a few moments until Cas lifted his head. “Are you hungry?”

            Dean thought for a moment, still trying to wake up. “Yeah.”

            “How do eggs sound?” Cas offered.

            He nodded. “Great.”

            Hesitantly, Cas climbed out of bed and walked into the kitchen. He pulled a carton of eggs out of the fridge and cracked them into a bowl. Grabbing a fork, he stirred the eggs and poured them onto the hot pan.

            Dean unsteadily made his way into the room and sat at the table. “What time is your dad going to be home?” he asked.

            Cas glanced over at the clock. “He said by around noon.” Once the eggs were scrambled, he scooped them onto two plates with a slice of toast and set them at the table.

            They ate in silence for a moment. “Do you have any plans for today?” Dean asked, taking a bite of his toast.

            “Nope. Might get some writing in,” Cas thought aloud.

            There was once question burning in each boy’s mind: how were things going to be at school on Monday? While Dean didn’t care what everyone else thought, Cas wasn’t sure if he could handle being ridiculed constantly.

            “What on earth are we going to do?” Cas sighed.

            Dean paused. “I have no idea.”

 

* * *

 

            Monday was hell for Cas. During Science, he could feel Cole’s gaze burning into the back of his head and overheard multiple slurs muttered as he walked from class to class. He was certain he would break down at some point that day, but he managed to make it all the way to gym without having any incidents.

            Seeing Dean standing in the locker room trying to open his locker let a sigh of relief wash over Cas. He was finally safe. Fighting the urge to run into Dean’s arms, he went over to his own locker and got changed.

            Today they would be playing dodgeball, which was Cas’ least favorite part of gym. He could feel himself becoming anxious as boys filed out of the locker room and into the gym. He made his way over to Dean as the crowed thinned and the two of them were standing alone.

            Dean wrapped his arms around Cas, pulling him into a hug. “Everything will be okay, Cas, I promise. If anyone lays a hand on you or says anything, they won’t ever see the light of day,” Dean reassured him.

            Cas rested his head against Dean’s chest and took a deep breath before pulling away and heading into the gym. With every step they took toward the gym door, Cas could feel his pulse race even faster. He flashed a worried look over at Dean, who offered an encouraging smile.

            The two boys stepped into the gym and lined up alone the wall. Luckily, Cas and Dean were placed on the same team.

            Before he knew it, Cas was lost in the midst of balls flying across the gym one after the other. He and Dean seemed to get out more often than the other boys, which poked at Cas’ curiosity.

            He decided to test his theory. Once the two were back in the game, he kept his eye on the people around him. His eye darted from boy to boy and saw their gazes flickering over the corner where Cas and Dean were standing. Some people were starting intensely. Cas easily brushed it away, but Dean found it hard to let go of. Every time they got hit, he let out a huff of annoyance.

            “If you show your anger,” Cas told him in a singsong voice. “Then they’re winning, not you.”

            “Well, we certainly aren’t winning any game, whether it’s dodgeball or petty drama,” Dean grumbled.

            Cas rolled his eyes and turned his head forward. It all happened so fast that Cas swore he saw his life flash before his eyes.

            A huge ball came soaring across the gym and hit Cas square in the face. It knocked him backwards and sent this legs flailing in the air, hitting his head on the hard wooden floor.

            “Cas!” Dean shrieked, crouching down.

            Cas moaned. His head was throbbing and he could hardly feel his nose. He took one look at Dean and narrowed his eyes.

            “This is why I don’t play dodgeball.”

 

* * *

 

 

            Cas spent the next few hours alone in the nurse’s office. Being isolated away from everyone was a relief after such an intense morning and allowed him to take a breather. Cas couldn’t help but replay the day’s incidents over and over again in his head, which was still throbbing slightly. His nose had bled a little, but other than that, the accident left him without a scratch.

            But Cas didn’t think it was an accident.

            He knew someone had hit him on purpose. Cas was certain of that. The moment he went back to class and saw Dean, he was certain the boy would be fuming to get revenge.

            Eventually, Cas was well enough to leave the safety of the nurse’s office. He couldn’t hide forever and facing the homophobia of his pupils was inevitable. He tried to amble as much as he could through the hallway, but he soon made it to math class.

            As soon as Cas walked in the door, Dean’s head shot up. He had a concerned look on his face and held his gaze on Cas until he sat down.

            “How are you holding up?” Dean whispered.

            Cas sighed. “Alright, I guess. What about you?”

            Dean paused. “People are being assholes still, but whatever.”

            Cas managed to jot down a few notes from Dean’s paper that he had missed. Once he was done, he set his pencil down and sighed once more.

            “Dean…how are we going to do this every day?” Cas mumbled.

            Dean looked over at him.

            “Honestly…I don’t know.”

 

* * *

 

 

            The next few hours seemed to fly by for Cas. Once the final bell rang to signal the end of school, he felt like a heavy weight had been taken off of his shoulders.

            Cas and Dean were walking on the pavement to Cas’ house. He wasn’t sure if Chuck was home, but he didn’t really want him to meet Dean yet. It’s not that Cas was ashamed or embarrassed of Dean. Chuck didn’t know Cas was gay, so he would think that Dean was just a friend. Dean wasn’t _just_ a friend. Well, technically he was…

            Why does life have to be so complicated? Why couldn’t Cas just go up to Dean and press his lips against his, feeling the warmth of Dean’s mouth and the smoothness of his lips. Cas was longing to run his fingers through his hair and feel his breath against his skin. It was so simple to fantasize about Dean, so why was it so hard in real life?

            Because Cas had never kissed anyone before.

            Cas would have no idea what he was doing. What if the kiss was too long? What if it was too short? What if Dean was so completely and utterly disgusted that he never wanted to kiss or even talk to Cas for the rest of eternity?

            Obviously, Cas was nervous.

            Cas knew that Dean had kissed girls before, but he wasn’t sure of Dean’s sexuality and didn’t want to make any assumptions. What if Dean really was straight and he was just stringing Cas along for amusement?

            Just the mere thought of that made his heart nearly shatter into a billion pieces.

            “Are you alright, Cas?” Dean asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

            “Mmhm,” Cas hummed. He could feel his face heating up.

            Once they reached the house, he unlocked the door and they walked inside. Cas took one glance at the couch and stopped dead in his tracks.

            Chuck was sitting on the couch.

            “Hey, Cas! Who’s your friend here?” he greeted.

            Cas wasn’t sure what to do. They took a few steps forward until they were in the living room.

            “Um, hey, Dad. This is Dean. Dean Winchester,” Cas told him awkwardly.

            “Well, hello Dean,” Chuck nodded.

            Dean smiled charismatically. “Hey.”

            “Well, we’re going to go to my room now…so…bye,” Cas mumbled, slowly walking backwards to his door. He opened it and Dean followed him inside. Cas shut it behind him and sighed.

            “He seems nice,” Dean thought aloud, sitting on Cas bed.

            “He’s a great Dad, “ Cas nodded, pacing around for a moment.

            “Are you this nervous with all your friends when they meet your dad?” Dean questioned, raising an eyebrow.

            “Well, no. This is…different. Not that I really have that many friends…” Cas stuttered, sitting down in front of him.

            “What makes this different?” Dean asked.

            “It’s not different,” Cas spat in a panic. “It’s a totally normal friendship between two—“

            “I get it, Cas. I was just messing with you,” Dean chuckled. “You don’t have to be so nervous.”

            He let out a sigh of relief. “Why does life have to be so complicated?”

            Dean shook his head. “I ask myself that every day.”

            Once they had finished their homework, Cas plopped back onto his bed and let out a groan. “I hate math.”

            Dean was already lying down. “You can say that again.”

            Cas fidgeted around for a moment and tried to get comfortable. His hand brushed up against Dean’s palm, making his skin tingle with anticipation. He stiffened at first, but an idea suddenly came to him. Life didn’t have to be complicated. Cas didn’t have to wait for Dean to make the first move every time. He took a deep breath and swallowed.

            Cas let his fingers slide around Dean’s hand. He could feel his own heart pulsating and his mind whirling with endless thoughts. Their fingers were soon intertwined and Cas’ stomach felt like it was going to burst.

            He turned on his side and faced Dean, who had let go of his hand and brought it around Cas’ back. He pulled him closer, making Cas sigh into his chest. Dean faced him and let his hand rest on Cas’ waist, gradually sliding his fingers under the hem of his shirt so that he was touching Cas’ bare skin. Cas took a shallow breath and let a moan escape from his lips. He brought his hand slowly up to Dean’s chest, letting his palm feel every crevice through his shirt.

            “Dean…” Cas whispered.

            “Shh…” Dean mumbled, leaning in so that their foreheads were pressed together.

            They stayed like that for a few moments. Cas was temped to move closer and kiss him, but he wasn’t ready to do that himself. He figured Dean would be much better at that than Cas could ever be.

            “Dean…” Cas whispered once more.

            “What?” he asked softly.

            “I’ve never felt this way about someone before…” he admitted, his cheeks turning pink.

            “Neither have I,” Dean whispered.

            Cas smiled. “How do you feel about me, Dean?”

            Dean blinked back at Cas before opening his mouth to speak. “I think I’m falling in love…with _you_.”

 

* * *

 

 

            Things were going smoothly for the two, so neither boy saw the events of the following day coming.

           

            Being in love for the first time almost feels magical. The world around you seems brighter and you can’t keep that certain person off your mind. Even though Cas was only fifteen, he learned that this was true.

            He found it difficult to concentrate in class at times because he was too busy glancing over at Dean. When he wasn’t with him, Cas was daydreaming about Dean and what he would say to him when the met again. He loved Dean, and if anyone wasn’t okay with that, then they weren’t worth Cas’ time. Luckily, a majority of their classmates had lost interest in poking fun at their relationship. It certainly took a heavy weight off of Cas’ shoulders.

            Cas would be meeting Dean’s family today. They planned on walking to his apartment after school and hanging out for a bit.

            “Sammy’s been dying to meet you,” Dean told him the day before.

            “Really?” Cas had replied, raising his eyebrows.

            After a whole day of school, the moment finally came. Dean led the way with a bounce in his step. He was obviously excited.

            Surprisingly, Cas hadn’t been nervous at all until Dean’s apartment complex came into view. Would Sam like him? What would his dad think?

            “Don’t worry, Cas,” Dean reassured him.

            As they entered the complex and approached his building, Cas could feel his stomach twisting and turning with emotion.

            They walked up the stairs and Dean unlocked the door. Cas took a deep breath before following him inside.

            The apartment was half the size of Cas’ house. It wasn’t anything too special, but Dean seemed proud nonetheless.

            A boy about ten years old was seated on the couch. His eyes lit up when he saw Cas and Dean walk in the door.

            “Sammy, meet Cas,” Dean introduced, bringing his arm around Cas’ waist.

            “Hi,” Sam greeted with a smile.

            “Hello Sam,” Cas managed to say. He was still somewhat nervous.

            “Where’s Dad?” Dean asked him.

            Sam shrugged. “Work, I guess.”

            Dean nodded and brought Cas over to a door on the other side of the living room. “Cas, welcome to my room,” he said, opening the door with a grin.

            Dean’s room was much smaller than Cas expected. There were two beds lined up against the wall with a nightstand in the middle. A few books were on a shelf by what Cas assumed was Sam’s bed and a small dresser was by the door.

            Dean closed the door behind him. “What do you think?”

            “It’s very nice,” Cas nodded. He had lived in an apartment with his dad before they had managed to save up enough money for their own house, but he never had to share a room before.

            Dean stood in front of Cas and let his fingers drift across his arms. Cas was used to Dean’s touch by now and found that he craved more and more of it each day. His hands eventually traveled down to Cas’ fingertips. He lined up their palms and took Cas’ hands in his own, lacing their fingers together. “I can tell Sam really likes you.”

            “Yeah?” Cas asked, raising an eyebrow.

            “Yeah,” Dean grinned.

            As Cas gazed into Dean’s green eyes, he found that he now had the perfect opportunity. Cas leaned forward slowly and pressed his lips against Dean’s cheek. Sure, it wasn’t on Dean’s lips, but it still made butterflies flutter in Cas’ stomach. When he pulled away, Dean was blushing madly, which soon turned into a look of terror.

            Dean’s father was standing in the doorway.

            He had seen the kiss.

            Dean had failed to mention that John Winchester was homophobic. When he had heard about Cas, he was somewhat suspicious of what really went on between the two boys, but he didn’t read too much into it.

            John narrowed his eyes, which were full of rage. “Dean. We need to talk,” John spat.

            Dean whipped his head back over at Cas. “I’m sorry, Cas. I—I didn’t mean for this to happen…”

            “Dean, _now_ ,” John grumbled, snatching Dean’s wrist and pulling him out of the room. He slammed the door behind him, leaving Cas alone.

            It took a moment for Cas to process for what had just happened. He could faintly hear the shouting in the other room.

            “I’m not letting you fool around with some guy. You’re straight. Cas is a bad influence on you. You’re getting off track, Dean. You aren’t gay.”

            “Shut the hell up!”

            “You stay away from that fag or I swear—“

            “Don’t you ever call him that! I can’t help how I feel, Dad. I like Cas. Hell, I’m falling in love, and all I need is someone to support me!”

            Cas couldn’t stop the tears from streaming down his face. What had he just done? He had ruined any chance he had with Dean. This was it. Cas would go back to his old life of hiding behind books and being tormented by Cole. These past few weeks were all just a dream and Cas was stirring from his slumber.

            A few minutes later, Dean flung inside the door.

            “Pack your bags, Cas. We’re getting the hell out of this place.”

            Cas tilted his head and furrowed his brow. “Where are we going?”

            Dean rested his hands on Cas’ shoulders and took a deep breath.

            “We’re running away.”


	4. Four

            Cas raised his eyebrows in surprise. “What?”

            “We’ve talked about leaving,” Dean said, grabbing a bag out of his closet and stuffing some clothes in it. “And now is the perfect time.”

            “But what about school? What about our parents? Sam?” Cas reminded him.

            Dean zipped up the bag after throwing more things inside. “The school year is almost over and my dad is pissed. Sammy…” he thought for a moment. “I’ll call him and try to visit when my dad isn’t around. I know a place where we can stay and have some money saved up that we can use for transportation.”

            “So do I,” Cas chimed in. He felt a bit bewildered, yet excited all at the same time.

            “Is your dad home?” Dean asked, standing up and slinging the bag over his shoulders.

            Cas thought for a moment before shaking his head.

            “Great,” Dean thought aloud, opening the door and walking out into the living room. Sam was seated on the couch with tears rolling down his face.

“Hey, Sammy,” Dean said in a soft voice, wiping his cheeks. “I promise everything will be okay.”

            “Where are you going?” Sam uttered, his voice sore from crying.

            “Somewhere safe. I’ll call you every day, okay?”

            “You promise?”

            Dean gave his little brother a hug. “I promise. I’ll see you soon.”

            He turned to face Cas. “Ready?”

            Cas took a deep breath and nodded.

            “Let’s do this.”

 

* * *

 

 

            Cas stood by the door and gave his room a final run through. He had packed everything he needed—clothes, his laptop, books, and a few other necessities. He could feel his eyes welling with tears. It was a bittersweet goodbye, but he knew that leaving with Dean was best for the both of them.

            Eventually, the tears started to spill one after the other. “ _I don’t belong here,”_ he thought to himself. “ _Nobody cares about me but Dean. I’ll be better off with him.”_

“Cas?”

            He sniffled and turned around. “Yeah, Dean?” Cas croaked.

            “Oh Cas…” Dean frowned, throwing his bag on the floor. He brought his arms around Cas and wiped the tears away from his soft cheeks. “I promise you’ll be okay. I know a guy named Bobby in South Dakota who will make sure we’re taken care of. It’s a thirteen-hour bus ride to his place right outside of Sioux Falls, but it’s pretty pricy. He’s going to help with the cost and everything,” Dean reassured him. “Plus, he agreed not to tell my dad we’re with him.”

            Cas sniffled again, a single tear rolling down his face. Dean brought his arms around Cas and rubbed his back. Cas leaned into Dean’s chest, letting his sobs escape his aching body. The past few months had been rough, and all he wanted was to be happy. Was that too much to ask?

            “Are you ready to go?” Dean asked.

            Cas held his breath for a moment before nodding his head.

            It was time for him to be happy.

 

* * *

 

            It was quiet at the bus stop when Cas and Dean arrived. It was 8:30 PM and Cas told his dad that he was over at Dean’s house. That was his first time telling a lie that big to his dad.

            “Living life on the edge is gratifying,” Cas admitted earlier that day after sending the text. He could feel a bubbling sensation in his stomach.

            “You’re such a nerd,” Dean replied with a chuckle.

            They agreed on a story in case anyone asked them where they were going. Cas was named Louis and Dean was Andy. They were visiting Dean—well, _Andy’s—_ cousin, Jerry, in Pierre, South Dakota. Cas even brought a bright red baseball cap and glasses as a disguise, but Dean refused to wear either articles.

            “Try the glasses on,” Dean pleaded.

            Cas hesitated before sliding them onto his nose. They had thick black frames and fake plastic lenses. He could feel his face heat up in embarrassment.

            A grin slid up Dean’s lips. “They look nice on you. It’s a shame you have perfect vision.”

            That made Cas’ face turn even redder that before. He smiled and looked down at his feet, making the glasses start to slide off his nose. Dean pushed them back up with his forefinger. Cas smiled.

            The bus rolled up the street. They grabbed their tickets and bags before climbing up the stairs and finding a seat in the very back. Cas sat against the window and Dean sat by the aisle. There were only a few other people on the bus with them seated in the very front.

            Dean slid his fingers across Cas’ hand, curing around and lacing their fingers together. “I promise everything will be okay. Bobby will take care of us. He’ll make sure we’re taken care of and have a place to sleep at night. He might even enroll us in school so we can finish up the year there, since I know how important education is to you.”

            Cas smiled, leaning his head on Dean’s shoulder drowsily. “Thank you, Dean,” He whispered. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

            Dean pressed his lips onto Cas’ forehead. “I don’t know what I would do without you, either.”

 

* * *

 

            Cas hadn’t realized he had fallen asleep until the bus hit a bump in the road, causing him to snap his eyes open. It was 9:06 in the morning and according to Cas’ phone, they were finally arriving Sioux Falls. He could feel his stomach bristling with excitement. He couldn’t wait to meet Bobby and escape his old life.

            He looked at his phone and saw various phone calls and texts from his father, which he deleted without even opening. Cas went into his phone settings and blocked the number. He sighed.

            “You’re awake,” Dean mumbled, his eyes fluttering open. He was so adorable when he was sleepy.

            “How did you sleep?” Cas asked.

            “Great, especially since you were beside me,” Dean smiled, his fingers brushing over Cas’ hand.

            The bus rolled up to the station. They grabbed their bags and hopped off, searching for Bobby. A man who appeared to be about forty walked over to the boys, smiling.

            “Cas, this is Bobby Singer, an old family friend. He’s kindly allowed us to stay with him,” Dean explained before giving Bobby a hug.

            “It’s been a while, hasn’t it Dean?” he chuckled, patting him on the back.

Dean grinned. “Bobby, this is Cas,” he introduced proudly.

            “Hey Cas,” Bobby greeted.

            “It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Cas said politely.

            They walked over to Bobby’s car and hopped in the backseat. Cas was prickling with anticipation for his new life to begin.

            “How was the drive here?” Bobby asked after a few minutes of awkward silence.

            Dean shrugged. “Alright. Cas managed to sleep though it,” he mumbled, glancing over at Cas and offering a smile.

            The drive to Bobby’s place wasn’t very long. They pulled up an old road that revealed an auto salvage yard in front of an old house. Cas shook his foot impatiently. He couldn’t wait to go inside.

            They pulled up to the pale blue house’s driveway. Cas took a deep breath before opening the car door and stepping out. Dean met him on the other side and let his arm wrap around Cas’ waist, pulling him close.

            “Ready?” Dean whispered.

            “Ready.”

            They walked up the old porch steps and entered the house right behind Bobby. It was old and cluttered, but it was better than nothing. Bobby led them up the stairs to a spare bedroom. It had a single queen bed with a couch against the wall and two nightstands on either side.

            “If one of you wants to sleep on an air mattress, I can—“

            “It’s fine, Bobby. We can’t thank you enough,” Dean nodded.

            “I’ll be downstairs if you need me,” Bobby called as he closed the door.

            Once they heard Bobby reach the bottom of the stairs, Dean leaped onto the bed. Cas grinned and rolled onto the other side, curling up right beside him. He placed his head under Dean’s chin and sighed.

            “This is great,” Cas mumbled.

            “Yeah…” Dean whispered, running his fingers through Cas’ soft, dark hair.

            Cas felt safe against Dean. Feeling his chest as it rose and fell with each breath made Cas’ stomach flutter. The warmth of his skin against him made Cas’ heart, as cliché as it sounded, skip a beat. He wanted nothing but to stay there with him forever.

            “Dean?”

            “Yes, Cas?” Dean muttered, his hands still in Cas’ hair.

            “When did you first realize how you felt about me?” Cas asked, running his fingers along Dean’s chest.

            “The moment I first saw you blush in science class and our gazes met, I knew I could never forget you, no matter how I tried. I didn’t realize I liked guys until I noticed myself thinking about you over and over again. I couldn’t get you off my mind and knew I just had to say something to you or I would never forgive myself.” By the sound of Dean’s voice, Cas could tell he was smiling.

            “Tell me how you feel, Cas. How do you feel about me?” Dean asked.

            Cas thought for a moment. There was only one way to describe the feeling in his heart, even if they hadn’t been together for very long. He lifted his head so he was staring directly into Dean’s eyes.

            "I…I love you, Dean,” Cas whispered, the words feeling foreign as they escaped his lips. He had never said that to anyone before, but finally expressing his feelings was a relief.

            The expression on Dean’s face changed drastically. Cas thought that he had made a mistake until he saw Dean’s gaze flickering right under his nose…right at his lips. He had seen this in movies many times before, but never in real life. Cas mimicked the maneuver, glancing at Dean’s soft, cherry lips that he had been dying to taste since that very first day in science…the very first moment they met. Dean leaned forward, closing his eyes. Cas copied him, letting his eyes flutter shut.

            And there it was: the moment Cas had been waiting for.

            Dean lightly brushed his lips across Cas’, making his heart ache for more. The pressure gradually increased until Dean’s lips were fully pressed against his. Dean pulled away after a moment. Cas let his eyes flutter open, his heart full of nothing but love for Dean.

            Cas was the one who leaned in this time, lightly pressing his lips on the corner of Dean’s mouth, then straight in the center. Dean brought his leg around Cas and his hand on the back of his head, pulling him closer. Cas placed kisses along Dean’s jawline, then his collarbone, and finally his lips once more. He pulled away and their gazes met, their eyes glittering with lust.

            Dean came in roughly this time, biting Cas’ bottom lip, and then letting his tongue slide in. Cas inhaled sharply, a moan escaping his mouth as he ran his fingers down Dean’s chest. It was exactly what Cas had expected it to be, only better. He ran his fingers through Dean’s hair and let Dean lead the way. He was more experienced, after all.

            “I love you, Dean,” Cas moaned.

            “Say it again,” Dean whispered against Cas’ lips.

            “I love you, Dean Winchester.”

            Dean sighed. “I love you. I love you more than anything in the entire world.”

            Cas slid his fingers under the hem of Dean’s shirt. He let his hand travel up his chest, which was a lot more muscular than Cas had originally thought. He let another moan escape from his mouth.

            Dean sat up and pulled away for a moment so he could pull his shirt over his head, making Cas’ eyes widened in surprise. Dean threw it across the room.

            Cas repositioned himself so that he was flat on his back. Dean lowered himself over Cas, bringing his knees on either side of him. He leaned in, pressing a kiss on Cas lips, then his neck. Dean’s hips where pressed against Cas gently. That’s one thing Dean was careful of. He didn’t want to hurt Cas, who was still slightly timid. He made sure that every movement wasn’t too rough. The last thing Dean wanted was for Cas to feel uncomfortable or afraid.

            Cas sat up and grasped the hem of his shirt. Dean pulled back and helped Cas lift his shirt over his head, throwing it somewhere across the room. Cas felt a little nervous to have his chest exposed, but it all faded away quickly. Dean dragged his fingers along Cas’ chest, his eyes gleaming. He flinched at Dean’s touch at first, but Cas became accustomed to it quickly.

            “Can I try?” Cas asked shyly. Dean raised an eyebrow, but once he understood he nodded vigorously.

            Cas pushed Dean gently in the same spot Cas was in only moments ago. He let his knees rest gently around Dean’s waist and leaned forward, biting Dean’s lip. Their chests were touching now. Dean ran his fingers through his hair as Cas pressed his lips against Dean’s, feeling his heart flutter. He let his hands travel down Dean’s arm and along his chest.

            “Am I doing okay?” Cas thought aloud.

            “Mmhm,” Dean murmured, bringing his hand around the back of Cas’ head for stability as they kissed once more.

            After a while, they decided to lie under the covers. Cas was curled up against Dean again with his head placed under Dean’s chin, just like before.

            “Thank you, Dean,” Cas whispered against his neck.

            “For what?”

            “Everything.”


	5. Five

            A while later, Cas and Dean walked down the rickety old stairs and into the kitchen. It was 11:03 and they hadn’t eaten since they left Lawrence the day before, so their stomachs were piercing with hunger.

            Bobby had left a few minutes earlier for work. He was a mechanic and spent lots of time at the shop, so the boys had some time to themselves. There wasn’t much to eat in the fridge, so Dean offered to cook.

            “I’m not the best, “ he admitted. “But it’ll be edible.”

            Cas grinned, pulling out a chair and sitting down. He wasn’t homesick yet, but he hadn’t really adjusted to the new surroundings. It was taking him a bit of time to process everything that had happened in the past few days. What was his dad doing right now? Was he searching for Cas? Or had he not even realized Cas was gone? Were the police racing through the city in search of him? His mind was racing, making Cas begin to feel overwhelmed.

            He pushed the irritating thoughts away and focused on Dean. “What are you cooking?” Cas asked curiously.

            “Grilled cheese,” Dean replied.

            It wasn’t anything too fancy, but Cas was certainly looking forward to inhaling the meal. Once Dean brought them each a plate of food and a glass of water, Cas didn’t hesitate to scarf down the meal.

            “Wow. This is pretty good,” he mumbled in between bites.

            Dean smiled proudly. “I used to make these all the time when I was younger.”

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “Really?”

            Dean chuckled. “Yeah.”

            Once they finished eating, Cas took their plates to the sink.

            “I’m gonna take a nap,” Dean announced, heading in the direction of the stairs with a yawn. He didn’t get much rest on the bus.

            “Okay,” Cas nodded. “I’ll be up in a little bit.”

            Once he was alone, Cas decided to explore. He did live here now, after all, and the only rooms he had been in were the kitchen and the spare bedroom.

            Attached to the kitchen by an archway was the library. It was littered with books and miscellaneous papers with an old wooden desk along the back wall. Cas could certainly do some writing there as well as read some new books on the couch.

            He was going to go in the basement, but he was too afraid to go down alone. Instead, Cas walked up the stairs and quietly slipped into bed next to Dean. He curled up against him with a sigh as he drifted off into a deep slumber.

 

* * *

 

            When Cas woke, the blankets were tangled around his feet and Dean was no longer beside him. When he glanced up at the clock groggily, he saw that it was 4:14.

            After taking a moment to fully awaken, Cas headed downstairs to search for Dean. He must not have heard Cas reach the bottom of the stairs because he was singing rather loudly to a rock song Cas didn’t recognize.

_“Broke all the rules,_ _played all the fools. Yeah, yeah they, they, they blew our minds…and I was shaking at the knees. Could I come again pleeeeease...”_

            Cas raised his eyebrows in amusement. Was Dean…dancing? He had never seen anything like it before, especially from someone like Dean. He let out a small chuckle. At that moment, Dean’s head shot up and he quickly scrambled to shut the lid to Cas’ laptop in embarrassment.

            “You saw _nothing,_ ” Dean muttered, his eyes wide.

            Cas laughed, poking out from behind the stairs and walking over toward Dean. “I didn’t know that Dean Winchester, of all people, enjoyed singing and dancing in the kitchen.”

            Dean’s face turned crimson. “Well, as a matter of fact, I _do._ And I’m assuming you don’t?”

            “Considering I always stay home when we have dances at school, that’s a no,” Cas mumbled, shaking his head.

            “Huh…” Dean muttered, thinking for a moment. “Do you want me to teach you?”

            “What?”  


 

           “I can teach you to dance,” Dean offered. A grin spread across his lips.

            “Really?” Cas’ eyes widened curiously.

            “Yeah,” Dean replied, stepping toward the laptop and opening YouTube. “Any song suggestions?”

            Cas shrugged.

            Dean went to Google and searched _old love songs_. He made sure it wasn’t something pop and fairly new. The last thing he needed was some bubble gum-ish Taylor Swift. He needed something classic and perfect for Cas.

            After scrolling for a bit, Dean hit play and met Cas in the middle of the kitchen as Elvis’ deep voice began to stream through the laptop speakers.

_“Love me tender,_ _love me sweet, never let me go. You have made my life complete, and I love you so…”_

            Dean let his fingers trail along Cas’ arm gingerly until they reached the top of his shoulder. He took his other hand and lined up their palms before lacing their fingers together. Cas, as confused as he was, brought his other arm up to Dean’s shoulder. His heart was fluttering with anticipation.

_“Love me tender,_ _love me true, all my dreams fulfilled. For my darlin' I love you, and I always will….”_

            He started out by stepping to the right, causing Cas to stumble a bit. Once they regained their footing, Dean led them to the left, then the right once more. Cas eventually caught on and followed his lead. Their steps were slow and steady, unlike the pounding of Cas’ heart. His blue eyes stared up at Dean, his expression full of love and admiration.

_“Love me tender,_ _love me long, take me to your heart. For it's there that I belong, and we'll never part…”_

            Dean pulled his arm toward him to guide Cas in a gentle spin. It caught him off guard initially, but he was soon gazing back up at Dean’s piercing green eyes. They were pressed against each other lightly now and Cas caught Dean making frequent glances at his lips. He teased him by sweeping his tongue across them seductively.

_“_ _Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled. For my darlin’ I love you, and I always will…”_

            Dean bit his lip in response, making Cas sigh. They had made a full circle around the room now and there feet were still stepping swiftly from side to side. Cas decided that he liked dancing with Dean. The thought of gliding with someone to music never appealed to Cas until that day when he tried it for the very first time with the person he loved more than anything else in the entire universe.

___"Love me tender, love me dear, tell me you are mine. I'll be yours through all the years, till the end of time…”_

            Cas’ gaze flickered down at Dean’s soft, pink lips. He leaned forward slowly and pressed his own lips against them, feeling a rush of energy flow through him. Nothing else mattered to Cas; the only thing on his mind was Dean Winchester and the feeling of their lips against each other as they swayed to the music.

            _Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled. For my darlin I love you, and I always will…”_

As the song came to an end, Cas pulled their lips apart and pressed his forehead against Dean’s. He wanted nothing more than to stay there with him forever.

 

* * *

 

 

            It’s easy to be caught off guard when waking up after resting for a whole eight hours to find that you aren’t in your usual bed. Cas didn’t mind that he wasn’t in his old room, though, since Dean was right beside him.

            Cas’ eyes fluttered open to see the walls bathing in sunlight. He turned his head to the right and saw that Dean was curled up against him with his arm around Cas’ waist. He smiled happily, placing his hand over Dean’s and sighing into his pillow

            He felt Dean begin to stir beside him a moment later.

“How did you sleep?” Cas mumbled with a yawn.

            “Better than I have in a long, long time,” Dean replied, yawning as well.

            Cas stroked Dean’s hand and closed his eyes for a moment before they agreed to go downstairs for breakfast.

            Once the two boys reached the bottom of the stairs, they walked over to Bobby, who was seated at the table.

            “Good morning, boys,” Bobby greeted, taking a sip of his coffee. “I was thinking that we could go eat somewhere for breakfast. What do you think?”

            Dean and Cas both nodded, as they were both longing to eat. They pranced back up the stairs and changed into some different clothes. Cas slipped on a black t-shirt and jeans with a tan trench coat that he hadn’t worn yet. When he stepped out of the bathroom, he caught Dean’s gaze, which was flickering over Cas’ body.

            “What?” Cas asked, puzzled. “Do you not like it?”

            “No,” Dean shook his head. “It’s perfect. You should wear that more often.”

            Cas felt his face heat up. “I sure will…”

            They raced down the stairs and met Bobby at the door. The three walked outside and headed over to the car. Cas and Dean hopped in the back seat excitedly.

            “I haven’t gone out to eat for breakfast in a while,” Dean told Cas with a grin.

            Cas nodded. “Same here.”

            Bobby pulled up to a diner a few minutes later. Cas stepped out the door, meeting Dean on the other side. He offered a smile, which made Dean grin in response.

            They walked inside and got a booth by the window. Cas and Dean were seated next to each other, Dean’ fingers tracing the outline of Cas’ hand.

            “So, what did you guys do yesterday?” Bobby asked curiously.

            Cas and Dean flashed a glance at each other. “Nothing in particular…” Dean muttered, not mentioning the dance or the kiss.

            The waitress came by and took their order. Cas got some waffles and Dean got pancakes with bacon.

            “We’re getting some apple pie for dessert,” Dean announced.

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “Do people even eat dessert after breakfast?”

            Dean thought for a moment and shrugged. “Well, I’ll order some anyway.”

            Cas chuckled, lacing his fingers with Dean’s.

 

            “So, Cas, Dean mentioned that you like to write,” Bobby said once the waiter dropped off their drinks.

            Cas looked down at the table. “Yeah…it’s been a hobby of mine for quite a few years now. It’s relaxing and nice to get my ideas on paper, or even just see them on a screen.”

            Dean grinned. “His writing is amazing. He actually let me read some of it the other day.”

            Cas felt his face heat up. “Oh, it’s not that great.”

            “Yeah, it is,” Dean insisted. “You’re incredibly talented.”

            The waiter came by and set their food down at the table.

            “This looks incredible,” Dean mumbled, taking a bite of his pancake.

            The portion sizes were massive. Cas wasn’t sure if he would be able to eat even half of the food on his plate. He cut the waffle apart with his knife and placed a piece into his mouth. “Mmm….” Cas mumbled. “This is great.”

            Cas noticed Dean’s gaze flickering to the other side of the diner from time to time when he realized there was a girl about their age seated at a table. Cas felt a sickening feeling in his stomach. Was that…jealously? Cas tried to let it go and focus on eating his food, but the girl continued staring. “ _Dean loves_ me, _and_ only _me,”_ he thought to himself. _“He wouldn’t start checking out some random girl, especially after all that we’ve been through…”_

            After a few moments, Cas couldn’t take it anymore. When he saw that the girl was looking over in their direction, Cas leaned forward and pressed his lips gently against Dean’s cheek. When he turned to look at the girl, she had a sour expression on her face and was looking back down at her plate.

            Dean was smiling now and let his hand trail along Cas’ arm. Cas felt the corners of his mouth come up to form a slight smirk. Nobody was getting between him and Dean, for their love was too strong and impossible to tear apart.

 

* * *

 

            “What was that all about at the diner?” Dean inquired curiously when they had arrived back to the comfort of their new room.

            “Huh?” Cas asked, turning around to face him.

            “Were you…jealous?” Dean asked, raising a single eyebrow.

            Cas furrowed his brow. “What? No way! Pssh, why would I be jealous?”

            “You’re a terrible liar, Cas.”

            Cas sighed. “I know…”

            Dean took a step forward and brought his fingers down Cas’ arm. They gradually traveled to his fingertips, taking Cas’ hands in his own. “I would never leave you, Cas. We’ve been through so much together. Hell, we ran away from home together. Our life here has only just begun and I’m not going to ruin our relationship by hooking up with some random girl.”

            Cas smiled weakly. “You promise?”

            “I promise.”

            Dean’s gaze flickered down at Cas’ lips. Without much notice, he pushed Cas against the wall and pressed his lips against his roughly. It caught Cas off guard, but he was soon running his fingers through Dean’s hair. Dean kissed his collarbone before moving on to his chest, forcing a moan out of Cas’ lips.

            Cas traced the outline of Dean’s jaw before placing his forefinger right on the tip of his chin. Dean bit Cas’ lip in response, his hand traveling under the hem of Cas’ shirt softly. Dean still tried to be gentle with Cas, not wanting to damage his little angel or make him feel uncomfortable.

            “You promise you’ll never leave me?” Cas whispered against Dean’s ear.

            “I would never do anything to hurt you, Cas,” Dean promised, placing a kiss on his cheek. “Although, you are cute when you’re jealous…”

            Cas blushed, pulling his closer for one more kiss.


	6. Six

            “We should go on a date,” Dean told Cas later on that evening as they watched Scrubs on the couch while devouring their dinner.

            Cas nearly spit out his food. “A date?” Cas repeated, a smile slowly making his way up his cheeks.

            “Yeah. I mean we haven’t been on an official date since we got together…”  
            Cas nodded. “True. Do you have any ideas?”

            “I was thinking we could go the amusement park,” Dean suggested.

            Cas’ blue eyes sparkled with excitement. “As in roller coasters and Ferris wheels?”

            Dean nodded. “Yeah. What do you think?”

            Cas grinned, but it soon washed away. “I’ve never actually been on a roller coaster…”

            “Really?” he replied in surprise, raising his eyebrows.

            “Yeah…”

            “Are you sure you want to go, then?” Dean asked after a moment.

            “Of course,” Cas replied without any hesitation.

            Dean grinned. “I promise I’ll be there every step of the way.”

            Cas let out a sigh of relief and leaned his head against Dean’s shoulder. “Thank you, Dean.”

            Dean smiled and brought his arm around Cas, pulling him closer. “Anytime, Cas.”

 

* * *

 

 

            The following morning, Cas woke up earlier than usual so he could hop in the shower right after Dean was finished and prepare for the day. He was thrilled to go on their very first date together. It was crazy that they hadn’t been on one yet, even though they had technically been dating for quite a while.

            Once he was dressed and ready for the day, Cas stepped out of the bathroom confidently. He was wearing some dark jeans and a white t-shirt with a blue button-up thrown over it. He wanted to look just right (and hopefully even impress Dean).

            Cas took a deep breath and started down the staircase, pausing halfway when he spotted Dean standing at the bottom with his hand behind his back. Curious, Cas carried on until he met him at the final step. Dean pulled his arm from his back, revealing a red rose. Cas felt his face heat up as he took it gently from Dean’s grasp. “Thank you,” he said, smiling and placing a kiss on Dean’s cheek.

            Dean grinned. “Are you excited?”

            Cas felt his heart flutter with anticipation. “Definitely.”

            Dean offered his hand, which Cas gladly took in his own. He guided Cas out the door, revealing Bobby already seated in the car to drive them to the location. They approached it at a steady pace, swinging their arms as they walked. Cas twirled the rose around in his fingertips, admiring the dark pigment it contained.

            Dean took a step forward as they reached the car, opening the door open for Cas. Cas was certain that his cheeks were red now, just like the rose. He slid in the seat and watched Dean close the door and make his way around to the other side.

            “Ready?” Bobby asked. Once both boys nodded their heads, he pulled out of the driveway and headed towards the amusement park. It was only about fifteen minutes away from the house. Cas could feel his stomach twisting and turning anxiously.

            Once they arrived, Dean rushed around to open the door for him. Cas stepped out, his eyes overwhelmed by the busy park. Multiple rides, food stands, and a huge Ferris wheel were all scattered around him. He was bristling with excitement.

            Dean ushered Bobby away with an almost comical gesture. He wouldn’t be coming back for a few more hours when it was time for the boys to be picked up. Dean took Cas’ hand and tugged his forward. “Come on!” he called eagerly.

            Cas followed him as they got in line and presented their tickets. Before they knew it, they were in the midst of a chaotic crowd of people attempting to choose their first ride.

            “Can we go on a roller coaster first?” Dean begged.

            Cas hesitated. “Well…”  
            “Please?” Dean pleaded, sticking out his bottom lip playfully. “I promise I’ll hold your hand,” he added in a hushed whisper.

            Cas felt his cheeks heat up. “Alright, then…”

            Dean led the way to a somewhat tall roller coaster. The line wasn’t too terribly long, so they slipped right in. “Are you nervous?” Dean asked curiously.

            Cas nodded.

            “Don’t worry,” Dean reassured him. “It’ll be fun!”

            They conversed as they waited, chatting about what rides they would be going on next and what they could eat for lunch. Once they were at the very front, Cas could feel his stomach churning nervously.

            They climbed up a single flight of stairs. Cas inhaled sharply as the seats came into view. They sat in their own row towards the middle, strapping themselves in with seatbelts and lowering the bar.

            Cas was so uneasy that he almost forgot to breathe. When he inhaled, it caught Dean’s attention.

            “Hey,” Dean began in a quiet, calm voice. “It’ll be okay.” He slid his hand over Cas’ fingers and laced them together.

            “You promise?” Cas whispered, a whimper escaping his mouth.

            “I promise.” Dean squeezed Cas’ hand as they lurched forward, the ride finally starting. Cas felt his stomach drop as they went around in countless loops. His mouth was dry from screaming, which he did the entire time. It was a mix of fear and relief to get out all of the emotion he had been holding inside of him for the past few days.

            The wind whipped against Cas’ face violently. It felt as if he were flying through the air. He carried on screaming, still holding Dean’s hand for support.

            The ride eventually came to an end. He looked over at Dean breathlessly.

            “Did you like it?” Dean asked.

            Cas gasped for air. “It was _amazing.”_

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

            They spent hours going on ride after ride before they decided that it was time to go home. Cas didn’t want to leave. He was having so much fun with Dean that he didn’t ever want the day to end.

            “Can we please stay longer?” Cas whined.

            Dean groaned. “But I’m tired.”

            “But we haven’t been on the Ferris wheel yet!” Cas protested. He wouldn’t stop talking about it the whole time they were at the park, but Dean always refused to go.

            “Why don’t you want to go?” Cas asked after a moment.

            Dean hesitated. “The last time I went on one, it was with my mom…before she passed away.”

            Cas felt the smile slide off his face. “Oh…I’m sorry, Dean.”

            Dean shook his head. “We’re still going though.”

            Cas’ eyes lit up. “Really?”

            “Of course. I’ll be fine,” Dean shrugged with a small grin.

            “Yay!” Cas squealed, dragging Dean forward to the wheel. The line was short and he was eager to finally get on it.

            Dean was somewhat uneasy as they stood in line, tapping his foot and lowering his eyebrows in deep thought the whole time. Cas insisted that they didn’t have to go on, but Dean still stayed in line.

            Once it was their turn to go on, Cas and Dean walked up the steps to their cart and sat down. An employee pulled the bar down over their head and they were soon in the air. Cas could hear Dean breathing heavily as they traveled backward and farther up the wheel. He glanced over at Dean and let his fingers trail down his arm. They glazed over Dean’s hand and slid through the cracks of his fingers so they were intertwined together. Dean looked up at Cas with a timid expression. “I miss my mom,” Dean croaked. “I miss how things used to be when my dad wasn’t a complete…”

            “Assbutt?” Cas suggested.

            Dean chuckled. “Yeah. A complete ‘assbutt’. But I wouldn’t go back and change a thing. My life is the way it is because of my experiences and I wouldn’t be the same without them. Plus, I never would have met you if it weren’t for all of that. I don’t know what I would do without you, Cas…” A tear rolled down his face. Cas was a bit surprised, since he had never seen Dean cry before.

            “I don’t know what I would do without you, either,” Cas told him. “My life was dull and uneventful. I stayed in my room writing for hours and hoped that I would be able to make it through another day without having to face another person with a rude thing to say about me. I tried so hard to get through day after day of hell, and once you walked in that door during science class, it’s like I was seeing the world in a whole different way. I didn’t really start living until I met you…”

            By now, both boys had tears streaming down their faces and dripping onto their shirts. Dean let his gaze filter over Cas, landing right on his lips. He placed his hand behind Cas’ head, bringing him closer.

            Right there on the top of the Ferris wheel with the sunset giving the sky an orange hue, Dean leaned forward and pressed Cas’ lips against his own. Cas felt an unexplainable emotion ripple throughout his body. It wasn’t lust and much stronger than what most people described love to be. He was finally happy with his life after everything he and Dean had been through together, even if it was barely starting. One day, he would look back at that kiss on the very top of the Ferris wheel he shared with Dean Winchester and smile because it was easily the best one he had ever had.

            It was different than the other kisses Cas shared with Dean. There were still tears streaming down their face, but they were now tears of complete and utter joy. He had said it time and time again, but this time he meant it more than every before.

            “I love you, Dean Winchester,” Cas whispered against his lips. “I love you more than anything else in the world.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

            Cas looked around, puzzled. “Where is he?”

            Dean shrugged. “I just called him, but he doesn’t look like he’s here.” He dialed again.

            “Hey, Bobby, it’s Dean. You can come pick us up now.”

            And again.

            “Hey Bobby…it’s been ten minutes and you haven’t called back…let me know when you’re coming.”

            Then Cas tried.

            “Um, Bobby, it’s Cas. Is everything alright?”

            But they didn’t get an answer.

            “Bobby? It’s Dean. Please call back soon. We’re worried about you, man.”

            They had been ready to leave the park for over half an hour, but Bobby was nowhere to be seen. Thoughts were whirling through Cas’ mind. How were they supposed to get home? What if something had happened to Bobby while Cas and Dean were gone?

            They waited for ten more minutes before starting the long journey home on foot.

            “I just can’t believe he would just leave us there like that!” Dean huffed.

            Cas shrugged, his shoulders and neck tense. “I’m sure he didn’t do it on purpose. Something might be wrong…”

            “This is bullshit…” Dean spat.

            “Dean, calm down,” Cas instructed calmly.

            “But—“ Dean gave up with a sigh. “I just don’t understand how this would happen. What is something really is wrong?”  
            Cas shook his head in dismay. “We’ll just have to wait and see.”

            They complained the whole way there, wishing that they had picked more durable shoes earlier that morning when they got dressed. It was hot and both boys had beads of sweat rolling down their skin.

            By the time they arrived at the house, it was already dark. Cas’ feet were aching and his stomach was piercing with hunger. Dean searched for the spare key under the doormat and unlocked the door.

            The house was a mess (well, more than usual). The lamp in the living room had been knocked onto the ground, shards of glass arranged around the floor in disarray. The table was on its side, the chairs no longer sitting upright.

            Dean sniffed the air. “What’s that smell?”

            Cas shrugged. “I don’t know…” After thinking for a moment, he immediately placed the reeking odor in the room. A few weeks earlier in science class, they had done a lab that included a certain element with the same scent.

            “Sulfur,” they said in unison.

            “Why would Bobby have sulfur in his house?” Cas thought aloud.

            Dean shrugged. “I don’t know…”

            The boys weren’t sure what to do. They couldn’t call the police or else they would find out that Cas and Dean had ran away. Their fathers didn’t even know they were at Bobby’s in the first place.

            "I think he was kidnapped,” Cas concluded after searching the remainder of the house, which reeked of the unusual element.

            “We have to find him,” Dean told Cas.

            “Well then, let’s get started.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

            After eating dinner, the two spent hours researching. Cas was looking at maps and around the house for possible clues, but he had no luck. Dean was researching sulfur on Cas’ laptop.

            “You aren’t going to find anything,” Cas insisted.

            “Well, neither have you.”

            Cas rolled his eyes. He flipped through another map for what felt like the hundredth time when Dean stood up abruptly.

            “I found something,” he announced.

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “What is it?”

            “Well,” Dean began, sitting back down at the desk. “I think Bobby was taken by…a demon.”

“            A demon?” Cas repeated. “They don’t exist, Dean.”

            “But it makes sense! Listen, Bobby is standing in the kitchen about to make something to eat before picking us up when a demon pops in completely unnoticed. He turns around and Bobby is either possessed, kidnapped, or…killed.”

            Cas was starting to gain interest. “Okay, so maybe your insane idea is _somehow_ true. Where would a demon take him?”

            “Uh…” Dean thought for a moment.

            “Exactly,” Cas scoffed.

            “Listen, Cas, this is the only lead we’ve got so far. We need to at least try and look into it,” Dean pleaded.

            Cas stared coldly into Dean’s eyes, but the moment he realized the desperate expression on the boy’s face, he realized that Dean was right. They were possibly one step closer to finding Bobby and they couldn’t stop now.

            “Alright, Dean. What do we do now?”

            Dean’s face lit up for a brief moment before fading away. “I…I’m not sure.”

            Cas sighed. This was going to be an awfully long night.


	7. Seven

_“Back in black I hit the sack_ _. I been too long I'm glad to be back, yes I am…”_

            Cas jumped abruptly. “What the hell?”

            The boys had fallen asleep researching on the couch. Cas was curled up around Dean, the laptop at their feet with the lid still open.

_“Let loose from the noose that's kept me hanging about. I keep looking at the sky ‘cause it's gettin' me high…”_

            Dean grabbed his phone from the coffee table. “Oh, that’s my alarm.”

            Cas raised an eyebrow. “Interesting choice of music…”

            “What’s wrong with AC/DC?”

            Rolling his eyes playfully, Cas headed into the kitchen and opened the fridge. His eyes glanced over at the clock. It was only 9:00 in the morning.

            Dean yawned, slouching into one of the dining room chairs. “So, what’s the plan for today?”

            “Well, the fridge is stocked up, luckily, so we don’t have to worry about grocery shopping and—“

            “No,” Dean interrupted. “What are we doing to look for Bobby?”

            “Oh,” Cas nodded.

            “Since when were you concerned about the groceries?”

            Cas shrugged. “Well, we have to survive somehow, and if Bobby isn’t around to get groceries, then someone has to do it.”

            Dean clenched his jaw. “We’re going to find Bobby.”

            “I didn’t say we weren’t,” Cas snapped, turning around to pour the eggs onto the heated pan with a huff.

            “Cas?”

            He didn’t respond.

            Dean got up and wrapped his arms around Cas’ waist, placing a kiss on his forehead. “I’m sorry, okay? I…I just don’t know what to do. It would be different if it were just me out here trying to survive by myself, but I have to look out for you, too, and we have to find Bobby. It’s stressful.”

            Cas didn’t look at Dean. “Well, if I’m such a burden, then just leave.”

            “Hey,” Dean called reassuringly. “Don’t talk like that.” He took his hand and slid it under Cas’ chin, turning his head so that he was facing Dean. “I love you, Cas. You’re my best friend and the only person who I can trust unconditionally,” he reminded him.

            Cas offered a weak smile. “I know. Like you said, it’s pretty stressful with all of this going on. How do adults even do it?”

            Dean chuckled. “Well, I guess we’re about to find out.”

            Cas scooped the eggs onto two plates and set them down at the table. He sat down next to Dean and took a bite. “Where were Bobby’s last whereabouts?”

            Dean thought for a moment. “I think it was the house. It was a wreck when we got here, so that makes the most sense…” They had cleaned up around the place the night before, sorting papers into piles and sweeping the floor. Cas couldn’t bear to see it in such disarray.

            They sat in silence for a moment, focusing on their food. “I have an idea,” Dean thought aloud.

            Cas perked up. “Yeah?”

            “When I was researching last night, I found out how to summon a demon…what if we tried it and saw if anything happened? Then we would know if these things are even real.”  


            Cas raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Let me get this straight…a demon kidnaps someone you know, so you want to try and contact the thing?” He shook his head. “They are dangerous and you know that. We both know that very well.”

            Dean sighed. “But it’s the only thing that makes sense right now. It’s all baby steps, right? We just gotta find out if they exist first, then we’ll work from there.”

            “A crossroads demon?” Cas hesitated. “Alright. But no making deals, okay? We don’t need you going to hell, Dean. I don’t know what I would do without you…”

            “I promise,” Dean told Cas, placing his hand on Cas’.

            After they were finished eating, Dean took their plates to the sink. “We’ll need some rock salt that we can make into bullets,” Dean told him.

            Cas nodded, his eyes narrowing in deep thought. “Where are we going to find a gun?”

            Dean shrugged. “The basement? Bobby seems like the type of guy who would keep one handy.”

            “Yeah. Why don’t we go look, then? It’s worth a shot,” Cas agreed.

            They wearily approached the stairs that led to the basement and opened the door. It was pitch black and, like the rest of the house, very cluttered. Dean led them inside, searching for a light. He flipped the switch, illuminating the room and revealing a door to the right.

            “What does that lead to?” Cas asked curiously.

            “Let’s find out,” Dean suggested. He approached the door, Cas following behind, and examined it. It wasn’t your typical wooden door. “Why would Bobby have a room with an…iron door and walls in his basement?”

            Cas shrugged. “Open it.”  


           Dean gripped his hands onto the handle It took a moment for him to gain enough strength to twist it open, but once he did, what they saw was a surprise.

            The room was made of pure iron coated in salt with an unfamiliar marking pained on the floor. There were a few beds connected to the wall with a bookshelf and desk across from them.

            “What the hell is this?” Dean muttered.

            “I don’t know…a panic room?” Cas replied. He was shocked at what he had just seen, yet curious to explore.

            “Do you think there will be a gun in here?”

            “Possibly.”

            They started searching every inch of the mysterious room, but there was nothing to be seen. Right when they were about to give up, Dean looked under one of the beds. “Yahtzee!”

            Cas’ head shot up from behind the desk.

            “There are three guns under here,” Dean announced.

            “That’s great,” Cas nodded, heading over to the bed to take a look. He had never fired or even merely held a gun before, so he was a bit hesitant to take it in his grasp.

            “I wonder if it’s loaded…” Dean thought aloud.

            Cas shrugged, examining the unfamiliar object curiously. From the corner of his eye, he saw Dean’s eyes widen. “What?”

            Dean looked up. “It’s loaded…” He tentatively pulled out a single bullet. “With _rock salt._ ”

            Cas was so dumbfounded he nearly dropped his weapon. “Why would Bobby have a gun loaded with rock salt?”

            “Maybe he knew demons were on his trail. What if…” Dean thought for a moment, sitting down on the bed. “What if Bobby, you know, hunts these things for a living? I mean, sure, he’s a _mechanic_ , but when does he ever talk about work?”

            Cas hummed as he tried to piece everything together. “You have a point. Maybe there’s some other clue that Bobby is a…”

            “Hunter?” Dean suggested.

            “Yeah. A hunter. Maybe he has some information jotted down in a journal or a book around here somewhere?”

            “Maybe,” Dean mumbled.

            “Looks like we’re doing some more research,” Cas sighed.

            Dean moaned. “I hate research.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

            After nearly seven straight hours of hard-core researching, Cas and Dean were starving.

            “Can we _please_ get a burger or something?” Dean pleaded.

            “Alright, Dean. But we’re going to have to walk there. It’s not like we have someone to drive us.”

            Dean groaned in response. “Okay, fine.”

            They hadn’t spent all the money they took to the amusement park, so they decided to bring that with them to pay for the meal. After picking a small diner that was just around the corner, the two boys headed off on a quest for food.

            “They better have pie,” Dean muttered.

            Cas chuckled, rolling his eyes playfully. Dean’s fingers brushed up along Cas’ hand before he laced their fingers together.

            “Do you like it here?” Dean asked him after a moment.

            Cas nodded with a bright grin. “I _love_ it here.” He thought about leaning his head against Dean’s shoulder, but 1) they were walking and 2) Dean was a few inches taller than Cas. Instead, Cas pressed his lips softly against Dean’s cheek. Even though they had kissed and held hands so many times before, it always made Cas’ heart feel as if it were about to leap out of his chest in an instant.

            When they approached the door to the diner, Dean held it open for Cas. Cas felt his cheeks turn a bright rosy pink.

            A waitress led them to a booth tucked in the corner of the restaurant. Cas sat across from Dean and stared out the window. What was Bobby doing now? Cas hoped that he was still alive and well.

            Cas saw Dean’s gaze flicker across the room a few times. Curious, he followed his eyes to a man seated on the other side of the diner. “What’s wrong, Dean?” Cas whispered.

            “Hold on,” Dean instructed, getting up and walking over to the bathroom door, which was near the mysterious man. He saw Dean hesitate before uttering a single word: “Christo.”

            The man turned to face him, making Dean flinch. He rushed back over and slid into his seat.

            “What?” Cas demanded once Dean had returned.

            “His _eyes_ …they were _red_ ,” Dean told him, still in shock.

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “And…?”

            Dean took a shallow breath. “Well, I read that if you say Christo, Christ in Latin, to someone who is possessed, then their eyes flash black or some other weird unnatural color. So there’s basically a demon in this diner and there could be more for all we know.”

            “Then we need to get the hell out of here,” Cas muttered, slapping his hands on the table and standing up.

            “Wait!” Dean hissed, grabbing Cas’ arm. “He might know where Bobby is.”

            “We find out that demons are real and are _in the room with us_ , so you want to talk to it?”

            Dean blinked. “Exactly.”

            “This is practically suicide, Dean. We need to get out of here!” Cas whispered frantically, sitting back down.

            “We are one step closer to finding Bobby, Cas.”

            “I understand that,” he snapped.

            “But…” Dean trailed off as the man approached them.

            “Hello boys,” the stranger greeted, flashing a toothy smile. “The name’s Crowley.”

            Crowley wore a black dress shirt and dress pants along with a dark tie. His eyes were dark brown and he had a small amount of facial hair. He appeared to be in his mid-forties or even fifty.

            Cas and Dean shot each other a frantic glance, unsure of what to do.

            “You must be Dean Winchester,” Crowley said in a thick English accent. “I’ve heard a lot about you, especially after your father tried to kill me.”

            Dean looked at Cas once more. “What?”

            Crowley scoffed. “Did you not know your father was a hunter? Why do you think you two moved around so much? Why do you think your poor mommy is _dead_?”

            Dean flinched slightly at his words, but he quickly brushed it off.

            “News flash: your dad spent the past ten years looking for the thing who killed poor little Mary Winchester. Luckily, he found it just a few months ago when you moved to Lawrence.”

            “How do you know all this?” Dean demanded.

            “Because I can help you find your friend,” Crowley muttered.

            “And why would you do that?” Cas challenged.

            “Out of the kindness of my heart,” Crowley replied sarcastically.

            Cas rolled his eyes.

            “I just so happen to despise the demon who took Mr. Bobby Singer, so I would be happy to demolish his plan and get your little friend back.”

            Dean hesitated. “What’s the catch?”

            “There is no catch. I help your friend, I get back at a pesky co-worker and everyone goes home and lives happily ever after. Deal?”

            “We won’t go to… _hell_ , will we?” Cas asked timidly.

            “It’s not _that_ kind of deal. I don’t do that with someone as young and innocent as you two. I have good morals, you know.”

            “A demon has good morals? I find that hard to believe,” Dean sneered.

            “So do we have a deal?”

            Dean and Cas glanced over at each other before nodding their heads.

            “We’ll do it,” Dean responded.

            “How did you even find us?” Cas questioned curiously.

            “And how did you know my dad was a hunter? Not even I knew that…” Dean trailed off. He put his face in his hands and sighed before looking back up.

            “I’ve been following you since your poor daddy tried to kill me back in North Carolina. I followed you to Kansas when you moved because I still wanted revenge on John Winchester, but I could never get him at the right time. Once I saw that you and your little boyfriend here were leaving, I figured I could get you alone and possibly kill you, but then I realized I had the perfect opportunity to get revenge on this employee of mine who has been taking souls before their time.”

            “Employee?” Cas repeated.

            “Yes. I’m King of the Crossroads. I manage all the deals made by desperate humans and come get them in ten years. It’s quite the job.”

            Dean raised his eyebrows. “I bet. So, are you going to help us find our friend or what?”

            Crowley narrowed his eyes. “Patience, Squirrel.”

 

* * *

 

            “I can’t believe we’re working with a _demon_ ,” Cas sighed, shaking his head as the two boys returned back to the house. Once Crowley had left the diner, they quickly scarfed down one hamburger each and rushed back home.

            “I know,” Dean shook his head.

            Once they had changed into some comfy clothes, Dean sat back on the couch. “Can we watch Scrubs?” Dean pleaded.

            “Sure,” Cas replied, sitting right next to him.

            Once they were a few minutes in, Dean lifted his arm and placed it around Cas’ shoulders. Cas brought his legs up onto the couch and carefully rested his head on Dean’s shoulder. It reminded him of the first time he brought Dean home back when they were in Lawrence. The mere thought of that night made Cas blush. He had changed so much since then and was finally living his life.

            Cas sighed, burying his face in Dean’s neck. He looked up after a moment and examined the elusive features of Dean’s tired face. Dean brought his unoccupied hand and trailed his fingers along Cas’ jawline, his eyes flickering subtly at his lips.

            “Dean?”

            “Yes, Cas?”

            “Can you sing to me?”

            Dean’s eyebrows raised a notch as he let out a small, “Huh?”

            “I heard you singing the other day…”

            “Oh, geez…”

            “No, Dean, you sounded amazing,” Cas reassured him, resting his head on his chest. “Please?”

            Dean took a nervous breath. “I don’t know…”

            “Come on, Dean…” He lifted his head back up and stuck out his bottom lip. “Please?”

            Dean sighed. “Are you sure?”

            “I’m positive.”

            “Alright, then…” Dean cleared his throat as Cas leaned his head against Dean’s shoulder once more.

_“            Are you lonesome tonight? Do you miss me tonight? Are you sorry we drifted apart? Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day? When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?”_

            The first few notes were shaky, but Dean’s voice was deep and clear. It wasn’t perfect and he certainly wouldn’t be competing on _The Voice_ anytime soon, yet Cas found it rather comforting. He rested his hand over Dean’s heart, feeling it beat faster and faster as he continued to sing.

_“Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare? Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there? Is your heart filled with pain? Shall I come back again? Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?”_

            Cas traced his fingers along Dean’s chest as he sang. Cas could tell that he was somewhat nervous, but Cas wasn’t sure why. He had been longing to hear Dean sing since he caught him in the kitchen a few days before, but he could never find the right time to ask.

_“I wonder if you're lonesome tonight. You know someone said that the world's a stage and each must play a part. Fate had me playing in love with you as my sweetheart…”_

            Dean ran his fingers through Cas’ hair gently as he carried on. His heart was soon at a normal pace now that his nerves had washed away. Cas found it hard to keep his eyes open. Sleep was calling to him, but he wanted Dean to finish his song.

_“Act one was when we met, I loved you at first glance. You read your line so cleverly and never missed a cue. Then came act two, you seemed to change, you acted strange. And why? I've never known…_

_“Honey, you lied when you said you loved me and I had no cause to doubt you, but I'd rather go on hearing your lies than I go on living without you…”_

            Cas decided that he enjoyed Dean’s singing and wanted to hear it every moment of the day for the rest of time. It was crisp and calming, nearly lulling Cas asleep.

_“Now the stage is bare and I'm standing there with emptiness all around. And if you won't come back to me, then they can bring the curtain down…_

_“Is your heart filled with pain? Shall I come back again? Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?”_

            “Is that it?” Cas asked drowsily.

            “Yeah…”

            “Thank you…” Cas yawned, leaning forward and pressing his lips against Dean’s softly.

            “We should probably go to bed,” Dean suggested.

            “I’m not tired,” Cas protested, yawning once more.

            “You’re practically half asleep,” Dean chuckled.

            “Yeah, but…I’m too tired to walk.”

            Dean nodded. “Okay, then.” He brought one arm around Cas’ shoulders and another under his knees. Taking a deep breath, he lifted Cas up and slowly took him up the stairs. Dean was certainly struggling.

            “I can walk, Dean,” Cas insisted multiple times.

            “No, I can carry you,” Dean reassured him stubbornly. By the time they made it to the top of the stairs, Dean was gasping for air. He pushed the bedroom door open with his foot and set Cas down on the bed.

            Dean came to meet him on the other side a moment later. Cas curled up against Dean and fell asleep in the warmth and protection of the one person he truly loved.


	8. Eight

            When Cas woke the next morning, Dean was no longer beside him. He felt an ache ripple throughout his body. Cas let his hand graze over where Dean had been only a few hours before with a sigh.

            Eventually, he drifted out of the warmth and comfort of the bed and wallowed down the rickety steps. Dean was in the kitchen, only this time he wasn’t singing. Instead, he was standing at the stove.

            “Hello Dean,” Cas greeted, his eyebrows gradually rising as he entered the room.

            Dean’s head whipped over to face Cas as he made a frantic attempt to flip an egg. “Oh, Cas, you’re awake…”

            “Yes. Is everything going alright in here?” Cas asked, leaning against the counter.

            Dean clenched his jaw. “Um, yeah, everything is going perfectly fine…” He flipped another egg, which was burned by now.

            “Dean, let me cook breakfast.”

            “No, Cas, it’s fine,” Dean insisted.

            “Dean, I can help you…”  


            “Cas, it’s fine, I’ve got this…”

            Cas took the spatula out of Dean’s hand.

            “Hey!” Dean protested. “I was using that!”

            “Dean, this is _burnt_.”  


            Dean hesitated. “No it’s not!”

            “Do you not know how to cook?” Cas asked him questioningly.

            “Well…no. My dad never taught me, but he isn’t exactly going to competing on _Top Chef_ anytime soon,” Dean admitted.

            “Okay, then.” He took Dean’s eggs and put them in the trash. Cas opened the fridge and grabbed the carton of eggs. “What were you trying to make?”

            “An omelet.”

            “Let me teach you.” Cas took an egg, cracked it into a bowl, and stirred. He then poured it into a pan, throwing some cheese and vegetables in the middle.

            “Who taught you to cook?” Dean asked curiously.

            Cas shrugged. “I taught myself. My dad spends too much time writing to cook an actual meal, so I started cooking for us when I was nine.”

            “Wow,” Dean replied.

            “Now you try the same thing on the other pan,” Cas instructed as he flipped his omelet so it was now in the shape of a half-circle.

            Dean took a deep breath and gingerly picked up an egg, holding it over the bowl and cracking it lightly. He let the contents of it drop into the bowl, glancing over at Cas for approval.

            Cas nodded. “You’re doing great.”

            Dean took a whisk and swished the egg around in the bowl before pouring it into the other hot pan. The bowl was a little shaky, so Cas placed his palms over Dean’s hands to guide him. This made Dean smile coyly, a little hint of pink showing on his cheeks.

            Cas set the bowl down, pulling his hands away. “Now add some stuff to it.”

            Dean sprinkled some cheese and a few tomatoes inside the omelet and looked back up at Cas.

            After letting it cook for a moment, Cas flipped his own omelet and handed Dean the spatula. “Now, the moment of truth. Flip it,” Cas instructed.

            Dean took a deep breath before taking the spatula and sliding it under the omelet. He folded it over gracelessly, some of the contents spilling out into the pan. He cursed under his breath.

            “Don’t worry, Dean. You’re doing great,” Cas reassured him, wrapping his arms around Dean’s waist.

            Dean grinned, flipping his own omelet once more. After a moment, they were both ready to eat.

            “See? Was that so hard?” Cas teased him, placing his lips against his cheek. Dean grinned, sliding both of the omelets onto their own plates. Cas let go of Dean as he took the plates over to the table and sitting with Cas’ omelet in front of him.

            “I want you to try mine,” Dean insisted.

            “Okay,” he agreed, sitting down and taking a bite of Dean’s omelet. “Wow!” he exclaimed. “This is amazing, Dean.”

            Dean smiled proudly. “Yours is even better.”

            Cas grinned, taking another bite.

 

 

* * *

 

 

            Later that day, Dean received a call from Crowley.

            “He wants us to meet him at the diner so we can discuss conditions,” Dean told Cas after he hung up.

            Cas tensed. He was a little weary of trusting Crowley, but what other choice did they have? “Okay, then. Let’s go. But bring a gun with you just in case,” he insisted, sliding a knife in his pocket.

            Dean nodded and followed Cas’ instruction, meeting him at the door.

            “Please, don’t do anything stupid,” Cas told him.

            “I won’t, Cas, don’t worry.”

            They walked to the diner and waited outside the door for a few minutes. “Is he even gonna show up?” Dean wondered aloud.

            “Of course I will.”

            They turned around to face Crowley, who was wearing the same thing as the last time they had seen him. “Hello boys,” he greeted, flashing a toothy grin.

            “You wanted to ‘discuss conditions’?” Dean verified.

            “Yes, that is correct.”

            “And they are…?”

            “Well, I can’t just send you into a building filled with demons. That would be suicide. I will have to train you to fight first,” Crowley told them.

            “Why can’t you just go inside and rescue Bobby yourself?” Cas asked suspiciously.

            “Because I can’t afford to have angry demons after me.”

            “And we can?” Dean challenged.

            Crowley huffed. “Look, do you want my help or not?”

            “Yes, we do,” Cas reassured him.

            “When do we start training?” Dean questioned.

            “Now.”

 

* * *

 

 

            Before they knew it, there were in an abandoned warehouse training with a demon. It all seemed crazy to Cas that they were actually doing this, but they had to save Bobby, even if their method was a little unorthodox.

            “The first thing you two need to learn is combat skills, like firing a gun and being able to use that knife you have with you, Castiel,” Crowley told them.

            Cas felt his stomach drop nervously as his hand grazed over the bulge in his pocket.

            “Also, you’ll need this,” he handed them each a slip of paper.

            Dean raised his eyebrows and read it aloud. “Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiri—“

            “Stop it, Squirrel!” Crowley spat. “That’s an exorcism. You’ll need to have that memorized.”

            “Why do you call me—”

            “Anyway,” Crowley interrupted. “Now for firing a gun. Follow me.” He led them to a small room in the corner with three targets lined up alone the wall. Handing them each a gun, he stepped back and leaned against the wall. “Show me what you know.”

            Cas and Dean traded glances before lifting their weapons timidly. When Dean fired his, it hit the target right in the head. Cas, on the other hand, wasn’t even close to making the shot. He fired a few more times, only getting slightly closer.

            Crowley simply blinked back. “Well, we certainly have room for improvement, don’t we?” Cas sulked a little, but he soon had to brush it away when it was time to move on.

 

* * *

 

 

            They spent the next few hours practicing combat skills. Once it was finally time to go home, both boys were exhausted.

            Dean unlocked the door to the house and flung it open. He plopped on the couch and let out a sigh. The sun had already set over Sioux Falls and neither boy was hungry, so they had a whole evening to do whatever they pleased.

            Cas sat down beside Dean, deep in thought. His mind was whirling around with countless questions and it was nearly impossible to shut them all out.

            “Cas? Are you alright?”

            Cas sighed. “What if we don’t find Bobby? How are we supposed to survive out here alone?”

            Dean didn’t reply at first. What was he supposed to say, after all? “I don’t know, Cas…I honestly don’t know.”

            “We’re going to run out of money eventually…and what about the bills? The water and everything will get shut off if we don’t figure something out.” Cas could feel his heart to speed up and his eyes well up with tears. “I…I miss home. Even though it sucked and people hate us, we didn’t have to worry about any of this. I miss my dad…” Cas was crying by now, tears spilling down his cheeks one after the other.

            Dean nodded. “I miss Sammy. I called him last night and he practically begged me to come home, but I…I just don’t know how I could ever go back. My dad hates me and everyone at school is a complete asshole…” A single frustrated tear rolled down his face, but nothing more. “Come here, Cas…”

            Cas slid over to him and leaned forward, sobbing into his chest. Dean took his arms and brought them around Cas’ back, pulling him closer. He let him cry for a few minutes before lifting his chin so that they were gazing into each other’s eyes. “I promise everything is going to be okay. We’re gonna survive out here. I swear we will. We’re going to find Bobby and he’s gonna make everything better. Then we’ll go to school and live our lives like never before,” Dean promised in a soothing voice.

            Tears were still flowing down Cas’ face, which Dean wiped away with his finger. “I love you, Cas. Don’t you ever forget that…” Dean’s gaze flickered down right below his nose and directly at his soft lips. Cas teased him by biting his own lip gently, making Dean’s breathing accelerate.

            Their faces were so close together that Dean didn’t have to lean in very much to gently press his mouth against Cas’ lips.

            It started off as just a typical kiss, but it soon switched gears. Cas gradually pushed Dean onto the couch so that he was lying on his back. He let his fingers trail along Dean’s chest as he came in for another kiss, which was much more rough than the first one. Dean brought his hand behind Cas’ head for support, running his fingers through his dark hair. Cas let his lips slide down to his neck, placing tiny kisses along his collarbone. Dean let a few moans escape his lips, grabbing a fistful of Cas’ shirt and pulling him even closer.

            After all the kisses he had shared so far with Dean, he was starting to think that he was getting better at it. It seemed like each time they locked lips, Cas never wanted the moment to end. How could it not feel that way, after all, if you were kissing the one person you truly loved the most? He no longer had to daydream about kissing Dean, which was a bit of a relief. He didn’t have to worry about being ridiculed by someone at school or Dean’s father seeing them together. Here, in the safety of Bobby’ house, _their_ house, they didn’t have to worry about any of that. They could simply get lost in each other’s lips without a single consequence.

            They eventually made their way up to the bed, for the couch was too constricting of their movement. Cas was the one laying on his back this time, letting Dean take the lead.

            Dean leaned forward and let his lips barely graze over Cas’ cheek before eventually making his way over to his mouth. “I love you, Castiel Novak,” Dean whispered, his breath hot and heavy against Cas’ lips. Cas felt a wave of heat rush over him. Dean took his teeth and bit Cas’ bottom lip, making Cas sigh longingly. He wanted Dean to just kiss him already, but he remembered that he needed to be patient. Dean was more experienced; therefore, he knew exactly what he was doing and had every intention to make Cas crave that kiss. Who would think that a kiss, a single action of the lips, could spark so much emotion inside of a person?

            As Cas grew more and more desperate, Dean let his fingers travel under the hem of Cas shirt, feeling every ridge of his chest. Another moan seeped out of Cas’ lips, sending a ripple of emotion throughout his body. Was it love? Lust? Perhaps it was a strong mix of the two? Cas didn’t spend much time thinking about it, because Dean was soon flinging Cas’ shirt across the room and pressing kisses along his bare chest, trigging more breathily sighs. “Dean…” he moaned, his voice thick with love.

            Dean eventually made his way back up to Cas lips. Cas slid his tongue in coyly, raking his fingers along Dean’s chest. Every kiss they shared was more passionate than the last.

            “Please, don’t leave me, Dean. I don’t know what I would do without you,” Cas whimpered.

            “Shh…” Dean mumbled. “I would never do that. I love you too much, Castiel.”


	9. Nine

            Things got complicated in their search for Bobby as Cas came down with a cold.

            It started with small sneezes here and there while they were researching and some coughing while they sat on the couch watching Scrubs.

            “I’m fine,” Cas had insisted. The last thing they needed while trying to find Bobby was for someone to get sick. They didn’t have enough money to take Cas to the doctor (plus, they would have to deal with health insurance, which Dean didn’t know anything about).

            “You’re not fine,” Dean told him, running his fingers through Cas’ hair. “We should take it easy today and—“

            “But we need to find Bobby!” Cas moaned, coughing once more.

            When Cas woke the next morning, his muscles were sore and he felt hot. He curled up closer against Dean’s chest and sighed.

            “Cas, you’re very warm.”

            “No, I’m not, Dean. I’m perfectly fine.”

            “You’re burning up.”

            Cas moaned, his throat raw from coughing. “Okay, fine. I’m sick. What am I supposed to do, then? We still have more training with Crowley and we’re doing so well. I nearly pinned you down yesterday.”

            “But you couldn’t because you collapsed from exhaustion. You’re _sick_.”

            Cas rolled his eyes, moaning once more.

            Dean got up and went over to the bathroom. Cas heard him rummaging around in the medicine cabinet, searching for something. Once he returned, he had a thermometer pinched between his forefinger and thumb.

            “Open up,” Dean instructed, sliding it under Cas’ tongue. It beeped a moment later. “One hundred point three,” Dean read aloud.

            “It’s not that bad,” Cas muttered.

            “But it’s still a fever.”

            “Okay, _mom,_ ” he groaned, yanking the blankets back over his head. “I don’t know what to tell you.”

            “We need to take it easy today. Please? Do it for me,” Dean pleaded, lying down beside him. He ran his fingers though Cas’ hair once more.

            Cas thought for a moment. His body ached with every movement, no matter how small it was. Was it really worth staying home for a day when Bobby needed their help? Was it really worth being miserable all day during training? Cas sighed.

            “I guess I’ll stay home,” he murmured reluctantly.

            “Okay, Cas. I’ll make you some eggs,” Dean offered, running his hand along Cas’ warm cheek.

            A few minutes later, Cas heard the door to the bedroom creak open. He poked his head out from under the covers to see Dean walking in with a tray of food. Cas sat up as Dean placed it on his lap. “I made some scrambled eggs, toast, bacon, and a glass of orange juice.”

            “Your cooking skills are certainly improving,” Cas chuckled. “Thank you, Dean. I really appreciate it.”

            Dean smiled proudly. “Thanks.” He slid in bed next to Cas, rubbing his back as he ate. After a few moments, he glanced over at him. “Scrubs?”

            “Sure,” Cas nodded, taking a sip of his juice.

            Dean grabbed the laptop and opened Netflix in a new tap. They were already on season two of the show and Dean was certainly hooked.

            “Who’s your favorite character?” Cas asked curiously.

            Dean thought for a moment. “The janitor.”

            Cas raised an eyebrow.

            “He’s hilarious!” Dean exclaimed, poking Cas playfully. “What about you?”

            “Hmmm…J.D.”

            “Typical.”  


            “What’s that supposed to mean?”

            “He’s the main character. Of course you’re gonna like him!” Dean teased.

            Cas rolled his eyes, setting the empty tray back on the floor. Dean brought his arm around Cas, pulling him closer.

            “Dean…” Cas squirmed. “I don’t want to get you sick.”

            “I don’t care,” Dean told him, placing a kiss on Cas cheek.

            “Dean, we don’t need you getting sick,” Cas pleaded.

            “I won’t,” he reassured him, resting his chin on Cas’ head. “You still feel warm.”

            “I know,” Cas sighed. He hated being sick, especially at such a crucial time in their training. They were so close to finding Bobby and dealing with the demons that had kidnapped him.

            They watched Scrubs for another hour before Dean spoke once more. “Do you want me to go and get some chicken noodle soup from the store?”

            “That would be great,” Cas agreed. “Thanks.”

            “I’ll be back in a bit,” Dean told him, pressing his lips against Cas’ forehead softly. “I love you.”

            Cas smiled, running his fingers along Dean’s cheek. “I love you, too.”

            It was nice to be home by himself, yet lonely all at the same time. Cas was in a deep slumber when he heard noises downstairs, startling him awake. Dean was finally home. His throat felt dry, so he leaned over and grabbed his glass of orange juice. His hand was shaking, making a few droplets spill onto the comforter. Cas cursed under his breath. “Dean?” he called, his voice crackly. “Can you get me some paper towels?”

            He didn’t hear a reply.

            “Dean?”

            Still no reply.

            Cas soon found himself hiding in the safety of his room, anxiety pumping through his veins. He slid out of bed, stealthily peering out the door. He didn’t see anyone, so he slipped through the crack and hid behind the wall next to the stairs. When no noise was heard downstairs, he stalked down the staircase, trying not to make any noise or sudden movements.

            Cas reached the bottom of the staircase and still didn’t see anyone. He sniffed the air and his eyes immediately widened.

            Sulfur.

            He raced over to the kitchen, snatching a bag of salt (yes, a bag. Cas and Dean assumed that was because Bobby had demons on his tail…that or he had a thing for salt). Cas also grabbed the demon knife Crowley had given him from the drawer. Rushing over to the center of the room, he poured a ring of salt, standing in the middle. He would be safe there.

            “Come out, you filthy bastards!” Cas yelled, his hand grasping the knife tightly. “I know you’re in here somewhere!”

            Three strangers appeared from the library, startling Cas slightly. Their eyes flashed red, making Cas bristle with hostility. “What are you doing here?”

            “We know what you and your little boyfriend are plotting with Crowley,” one of them, a girl, spat. “So just give up. How do you even know Bobby is alive, huh? How do you know we didn’t kill him?”

            Cas wasn’t sure what to say. He was fuming with anger and ready to attack, but there was no way he could take on three demons at once.

            “Are you gonna do something or just stare at us, Castiel? Do something!” the other demon sneered.

            Cas searched around the room frantically. His gaze fell over the ceiling as he realized an unusual pattern painted on the wall: a devil’s trap. From what Dean had told him, any demon standing in a devil’s trap was powerless and unable to move.

            And the intruders were standing right under it.

            A sly grin made his was up Cas’ lips as he stepped out of the circle. The demons all took a step forward and raised their arms to use some of their powers, only to find that they were useless. All at once, they tentatively raised their gazes to the ceiling.

            “Looks like you’re a little, I don’t know…stuck?” Cas chuckled, twirling the knife around in his hands.

            Suddenly, the door creaked opened. Dean walked inside, the smile immediately fading away as his gaze fell on the center of the kitchen. He rushed over to Cas, sliding his own demon knife out of his pocket and setting the soup down on the counter.

            “Why don’t we gank these sons a bitches and get the stink out of this room?” Dean spat, his eyes narrowed at the three intruders.

            “I…” Cas began, his stomach twisting into a knot.

            Dean looked over at him. “What’s wrong?”

            “There’s a human in there, Dean. They possess a living, breathing human…and I have to kill them,” Cas whispered.

            “Well, exorcism is always an option,” Dean suggested.

            “Please?” Cas whimpered.

            “Okay, fine,” Dean nodded. He took a deep breath. “ _Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus_ _omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio_ _infernalis adversarii, omnis legio,_ _omnis congregatio et secta diabolica…”_

Cas was amazed that Dean actually took the time to memorize the chant. After about halfway through, the demons were released from their vessels, three big puffs of smoke disappearing through the ceiling. Cas felt a wave of relief wash over him.

            “Did we just…”

            “Yeah, we did,” Dean sighed in shock.

            “Can I go lay down now?” Cas mumbled, even more drained that before.

            “Of course.”

            Cas started in the direction of the stairs before Dean grabbed his hand. “Don’t forget the soup! I didn’t just go on a hour long journey to the store for nothing!”

            Cas rolled his eyes playfully, taking the soup and heading upstairs with Dean.

 

* * *

 

            Cas spent the remainder of the day resting in bed, Dean’s arm wrapped around him as they slept. He didn’t wake until he heard his phone ring beside him.

            Puzzled, he grabbed the device from his nightstand. It was a call from a number with a Lawrence area code, but other than that, Cas didn’t recognize it at all. He slid his finger across the screen, answering it. “Hello?”

            “Cas?”

            He felt his heart sink in his chest.

            “It’s Chuck.”

            “D—Dad?” Cas croaked.

            “Oh, Cas, I’ve missed you so much! Please come home, soon. Are you okay? Why haven’t you answered my calls? I saw the letter you left on the table, so I didn’t call the police when you—“

            “Dad…” Cas said once more, cutting him off. “I’m not coming home.”

            The line was silent for a moment. “What?”

            “I said I’m not coming home. Not now, at least.” Cas could feel his heart racing in his chest. Was this seriously happening right now?

            “Why not?” Chuck protested, his voice full of emotion.

            “I…I just _can’t_. Not after everything that has happened.”

            “I need you to tell me what happened.”

            Cas sighed, shutting his eyes. Dean was awake now, a confused look across his face.

            “Please, Cas, I—“

            “I’m gay,” Cas spat immediately. It felt nice to finally get it off his chest.

            “You, wait, what?”

            “I’m gay and I’m living out here with Dean. You remember, Dean?”

            The line was silent once more. “Yeah, I do. I remember him.”

            “I’m in love, Dad. And I’m happy. His family’s friend is—well, _was_ taking care of us. We have everything under control.”

            “Was?”

            “He…well, I can’t explain now, but I swear I will when I get the chance.”

            “No.” Chuck’s voice immediately switched gears, making Cas flinch. “You need to get back here, Castiel Novak, or I swear—“

            Cas hung up.

            When he turned to face Dean, tears were streaming down his face. He was in shock of what had just happened. Dean simply brought his arms around Cas as he sobbed into Dean’s chest, letting every piece of emotion flow out of him. Cas cried for a good ten minutes before he had tired himself out. Tears were no longer coming as often, but his breath was still unsteady.

            “Are you better now?” Dean asked, rubbing Cas’ back in attempts to comfort him.

            “My dad is a…” Cas began, unsure of a good insult.

            “Assbutt?” Dean suggested.

            That brought a smile to Cas’ face as he looked back to the first time he had mentioned the word to Dean. “Yeah, a complete assbutt.”

            “Are you feeling better?” Dean asked, bringing his hand up to Cas’ forehead. “You don’t feel nearly as hot as this morning.”

            Cas pulled away slightly so that they were making eye contact. “Seriously, since when did you become my mother?”

            Dean laughed, placing a kiss on Cas’ soft lips.

           

 

* * *

 

 

            That night, Cas couldn’t sleep. No matter how tired he felt or what position he was in, he found his eyes staring up at the ceiling, wide awake. When he did sleep, though, it was only for a few minutes and not very pleasant.

            The main thing keeping him awake were the nightmares that his subconscious mind concocted. Cas would wake up screaming, and Dean would just sit there speaking to him in a soothing voice and rubbing his back as he came back to reality.

            Right when Dean thought that Cas was finally asleep, another dream came.

            They were finally rescuing Bobby, only this time he wasn’t with demons. Instead, vampires had taken him. Contrary to popular belief, the only way to kill a “vamp” was to decapitate them, so that was their main goal: behead every vamp in the room so they could bring Bobby home.

            Cas and Dean were fighting side-by-side, carefully strategizing each blow. There was blood everywhere from the vamps that Dean had taken care of, but every time Cas tried to slice his knife along a vampire’s neck, he froze. He couldn’t bring himself to kill anyone or anything, no matter how hard he tried. Dean was constantly trying to save Cas from being attacked by the vampire Cas was about to kill and hardly had enough time to defend himself.

            When Dean was busy taking care of the vamp in front of Cas, he failed to see the one coming from behind him. “Dean!” Cas shrieked, but he was too late. The vampire had stabbed Dean right in the back, all the life pouring out of his body. He dropped onto the floor, his eyes struggling to remain open. The world seemed to stop all around him as Cas staggered forward, cupping Dean’s face in his hands. He was loosing blood rapidly and Cas knew that there was no way Dean would be making it out alive.

            Tears were streaming down his face. “Dean…” Cas croaked.

            “Cas…I love you,” he whispered, and everything around Cas went black.

            That was exactly how every dream ended.

            And every ending was more painful than the one before.

            “Dean!” he screamed. “Please, no!”

            “Cas! Cas, please wake up!”

            Cas felt a pair of hands on his shoulders as he snapped back to reality, his breathing still heavily. Dean was shaking him awake frantically, his eyes filled with concern.

            “Dean!” Cas cried. “You’re alive!”

            “Yes,” Dean told him calmly. “I’m alive, you’re alive, we’re both fine. It was a dream.”

            There were tears streaming down Cas’ face. Dean was now lying on his side, sighing as he drew his fingers along Cas’ arm. “Do you want to talk about it?”

            Cas shook his head.

            “Okay, Cas,” Dean replied, wrapping his arm around Cas and drawing him closer. “Everything is going to be okay.”

            That was his fifth nightmare that night, yet Dean was just as patience each time he was stunned from his slumber to Cas screaming beside him.

            “I’m sorry, Dean,” Cas sighed.

            “Shh…please, get some rest,” Dean instructed, pressing his lips against Cas’ softly. “We have work to do tomorrow.”

            Cas nodded, drifting asleep once more.


	10. Ten

            Of course, Dean got sick as well, so the mission to save Bobby was pushed back even farther than expected. Crowley was starting to get agitated, calling every day and even showing up unexpectedly. After a while, the boys sprinkled some salt around the windows and doors so that they wouldn’t have anymore unexpected visits, which angered the demon even more.

            “He’ll just have to get over it,” Dean told Cas a few days later while they were eating breakfast.

            “Do we really want an angry demon? He’s the “King of the Crossroads”, so I don’t think it’s worth making him angry.”

            Cas was glad that they could finally get back to training. Their next meeting with Crowley would take place the following day, so they had quite a bit of time to do whatever they pleased.

            He took another bite, watching Dean from the corner of his eye. He appeared to be fairly tense. Perhaps he was still feeling ill? Cas pressed his lips together, deep in thought.

           “Is something wrong?” Cas wondered aloud, resting his palm on Dean’s hand.

           Dean looked up. “No, why do you ask?”

           “You seem a bit…edgy.”

           “No…I just…” Whatever Dean was holding back, it was certainly gnawing at him.

           Cas raised his eyebrows. “Dean…did something happen?”

           “I…I found this in the mailbox,” Dean muttered, sliding Cas an envelope. It was addressed to Castiel Novak, but the sender didn’t include their name anywhere on the outside. Cas tentatively slid his finger under the envelope’s seal, pulling out a single piece of handwritten paper. He read it aloud to Dean:

 

 

 

Dear Castiel,

            It’s been a while since we’ve spoken, so I understand if you don’t want to have anything to do with me. It’s fine; I can handle that. But please—at least hear me out. Your father is worried about you. I know that you’re staying with Bobby Singer and that you are in love with Dean Winchester. I know how much he means to you and how well things are going, but you cannot stay.

           I can’t say much, but what you can know is that this isn’t where you belong; you don’t belong in this universe. The longer you stay here, the more people will be hurt back home.

            There was a spell casted by a witch named Rowena that transported you and Dean into this universe, this alternate universe, where you are a high school student. That means that this isn’t your life, Castiel. All those “memories” you have aren’t real. They were created by the spell. Don’t let them keep you here. You need to break the spell and come home. There, you and Dean can live happily without any consequences. This also means that I am not your real mother, but in the universe you are stuck in, I am.

           We miss you and Dean deeply and want you to come home.

Yours truly,

Becky Rosen

 

 

 

            Cas was in such a massive amount of shock that he nearly forgot to breathe.

            “M-Mom?” he stammered, unsure of what to say or do. “Or…person-who-was-pretending-to-be-my-mom?”

            “This is insane…” Dean huffed, shaking his head. “What if this is fake?”

            “It’s not,” Cas murmured, his eyes still glued to the paper. “My mom, or _Becky_ , wouldn’t lie. We have to get back home.”

            “You don’t know what the hell it might be like out there in the ‘right universe’. What if things are better here? What if out there I’m some loser who hits on random girls at bars and isn’t with you? What if we forget everything that we’ve been through together? We’ve gone through anything imaginable, yet some chick who isn’t actually your mom wants us to go ‘home’?” Dean protested.

            Cas shook his head. “I don’t know Dean, but if that’s the risk we have to take, maybe it’s worth it? Becky said that the longer we stay here, the more people will be hurt. How long do you think we’ve been stuck?”

            Dean thought for a moment. “I don’t know, Cas. Days? Months? Years?”

            Cas shook his head. “We _need_ to get home. What about Sam, well the _real_ Sam? How do you think he must feel without his big brother to protect him?”

            Dean shook his head. “Sammy will be fine without me…”

            “Dean…” Cas whispered. “Please. We’ll rescue Bobby first, and then we’ll go back. I…I want to go home.”

            Dean let out a sigh, unsure of what to say or do. “Fine. But finding Bobby is our first priority. I don’t care if this isn’t a real universe…I would never leave him behind, no matter what universe I’m in. Ever.”

            Cas nodded. “I understand. Looks like we’re doing more research.”

            Dean groaned.

 

* * *

 

 

            They spent the whole day going through countless websites on spells and what possible one she could have used.

            “It sounds powerful,” Cas told Dean later on that afternoon. “Whatever she used to do this wasn’t your typical spell.”

            Dean nodded. “Well, we’re making good progress, so, well, here it goes…” Dean took a deep breath, smiling mischievously. “Castiel Novak, will you go on a date with me?”

            Cas felt his heart leap in his chest excitedly. “I would _love_ to, Dean Winchester.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

            After they changed into their best dinner attire, they headed off to a small restaurant around the corner from the house. It wasn’t anything too big, but Dean knew it would be perfect for Cas.

            Dean held the door open as Cas stepped inside, his chest teeming with excitement. It was their second official date and he couldn’t wait for it to begin. A waitress led them to a booth in the corner. They sat down across from each other and were presented with menus.

            Once their drinks were ordered and they were finally alone, Cas let his gaze fall on Dean. He was wearing a flattering green plaid shirt and some loose-fitting jeans. He also had an amulet strung along his neck. He always kept it close to him because it was a gift from Sam and reminded him of his little brother.

            Dean slid his fingers across the table, placing them on top of Cas’ hands. “I’m glad we’re actually taking the time to do this.”

            Cas grinned. “We should be at home re—“

            “Shhh…” Dean mumbled. “No talking about Bobby or Rowena. We’re gonna enjoy our last few days as high school students before we’re suddenly full-fledged adults.”

            Cas rolled his eyes playfully as he clasped their fingers together. “Okay then. I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

            “Have you been writing much lately?” Dean asked curiously.

            Cas shrugged. “A little here and there. We’ve been so busy with you-know-what and I was sick for a while, so I haven’t gotten a chance to continue my story. It sucks that I might not write in the ‘real universe’. What do you think we’ll do there?”

            Dean, ignoring the fact that Cas was bringing the spell up again, sighed. “Hopefully I’m not some plumber who spends his evenings alone in his mother’s basement…”

            Cas laughed.

            “What if we don’t remember any of this? What if we don’t love each other in that universe?”

           Cas blinked. “I…I don’t know.” He almost considered staying there with Dean forever, but he remembered Becky’s letter. _The longer you stay here, the more people will be hurt back home…_

           “Let’s not talk about that now,” Dean told him. “We’re on a date, after all.”

           Cas nodded. “You’re right.”

           But they didn’t have much to talk about.

           “How are you liking Scrubs so far?” Dean asked after a moment of awkward silence.

           Cas lit up instantly. “It’s great! The season is progressing really well so far.”

           Watching Scrubs together was Cas and Dean’s only distraction from the hell they were going through while trying to locate Bobby. With all the added tension from Becky’s letter, they desperately needed a way to disappear from everything that was going on in their lives.

           “What do people even talk about on dates?” Cas muttered.

           “Probably something like, ‘Castiel,’” Dean said in a deep voice that was almost comical. “’What do you like to do in your spare time?’”

           Cas laughed and thought for a moment.

           Dean raised his eyebrows, waiting for a reply.

           “Well, I love to write and read, but that isn’t anything you don’t already know,” Cas grinned.

           Dean nodded with a small chuckle as the waitress came by to take their order. As Dean was speaking to her, Cas let his eyes flicker around the room. This restaurant was giving him a bad vibe, but he couldn’t figure out exactly what it was.

           “Cas?”

           “Hmm?” Cas muttered, jolted away from his thoughts. “Oh, yeah, I’ll have the bacon cheeseburger as well.”

           The waitress nodded before walking away.

           “Dude, are you alright?” Dean mumbled, leaning across the table.

           “Dean, something about this place doesn’t seem right…”

           “How so?”

           Cas, unsure of what to say, looked frantically around the room. “I…I think we should leave.”

           “But Cas…we’re on a date!” Dean protested. Cas could see how disappointed he was, but could they really risk their safety?

           “What are demon signs again? Cas asked, lowering his voice.

           “Uh…crop failure, electrical storms, unusual deaths, flickering lights…”

           “I’ll go investigate,” Cas mumbled. He got up to leave when Dean grabbed his wrist suddenly.

           “Cas…please be careful,” Dean begged.

           “I promise I will,” Cas told him, planting a kiss on his cheek.

           He headed over to the bathroom, feeling as if the gazes of the people he passed were burning into his skull. He entered the room and stood in front of the mirror, taking a deep breath as he repeated the list of demonic omens over and over in his mind. The lights around him flickered abruptly, making a chill run down his spine.

           Flickering lights.

           He bolted out of the bathroom, running across the restaurant and back to the safety of the booth. “Dean,” Cas began breathlessly. “We need to get the hell out of here.”

           “Why?”

           “The lights flickered in the bathroom and something tells me it wasn’t just a coincidence.”

           Dean grabbed his wallet, slapping a few bills on the table. “Let’s go, then,” he said as they started toward the door. A group of people cut them off, blocking the exit.

           “You aren’t going anywhere,” one of them announced.

           And the world around Cas went black.

 

* * *

 

           His head was pounding and a sticky fluid was trickling down his forehead. He leaned forward and realized that his movements were restrained, as he was tied up. It was pitch black in the room and nearly impossible to see a thing. Once he was finished taking in his surroundings, he remembered everything that had happened all at once.

           “Dean!” Cas hissed. Where was he?  


            “I’m over here.”

           He turned his head to the left to see Dean’s faint silhouette against the darkness of the room. From what he could see, Dean was not in the best shape. He had blood all over his face and dirt caked onto his clothes. Cas, who hadn’t bothered to check his condition yet, assumed that he was in the same rugged state.

           “Where are we?” Cas whined helplessly.

           “I don’t know,” Dean croaked, looking around. They were a quite a few feet apart, which frustrated Cas. He wanted nothing more than to curl up in the safety of Dean’s arms and bury his face in his chest. Maybe if he closed his eyes he would be on the couch with Dean, comforted by the warmth radiating from his body as Dean ran his fingers through Cas’ hair back in Lawrence? Why couldn’t this all just be a dream? Why couldn’t he just go home?

           “How long were we out?” Cas asked, his voice echoing.

           “Probably just a few hours,” Dean shrugged.

           “I’m hungry.”

           “You’re not the only one.”  


           Cas sat for a few minutes before tears started to well up in his eyes. He was scared and cold in the unfamiliar room. How the hell were they supposed to get out of there? He soon found himself sobbing, his hands shaking uncontrollably.

           “Cas,” Dean whispered soothingly. “I promise we’re gonna get out of here.” He paused. “I don’t know how, but we’re gonna get out.”

           Cas sniffled. “I want to go home. Hell, I want to be anywhere but here. I just want to be at home curled up with you in bed. I’m just so tired…”

           “Cas, come on, baby. You gotta stay awake. I have a feeling someone’ll be here soon.”

           Right on queue, a group of strangers walked in the room, the lights flashing on. Cas, blinked as he adjusted to the light. Dean looked even worse now, and Cas assumed that Dean was thinking the same as his green eyes widened in shock.

           “I’m sure you’re wondering why you are here,” a woman said, her voice ringing out in the room. They appeared to be in an abandoned barn, the moonlight filtering through the window.

           “Yes, we are,” Dean spat, trying to squirm free from the ropes restraining him.

           “I can assure you that this isn’t a situation you will be simply walking out of,” she continued, her eyes flickering red.

           “Y-you’re the people who took Bobby, aren’t you?” Cas stammered.

           “Yes, we are. And now we are the people who took _you,_ ” she cackled, taking a few steps forward. Her shoes clicked against the hard flooring as a sly smile crept up her lips. “And you aren’t making it out alive.”


	11. Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Suicidal thoughts mentioned

            Cas let a helpless whimper escape his lips. He and Dean weren’t going to make it out of there, no matter how many promises Dean made. Cas knew that deep down inside, he was done for. There was no going home, no returning to the right universe. Their journey was over.

            Cas always wondered what he wanted to accomplish before he died. Back when he was younger, he thought it would be becoming president, inventing something, or even writing a book. Now that he was a lot more grown up, he realized the one question he needed to ask himself as he felt the life fading away from his body was simple:

            Were you happy?

            And at that very moment in the center of the remote barn, Cas decided that yes, he was.

            Dean made him happy. There were some days that Dean was the only person motivating him to get out of bed in the morning. At an abnormally low point in the year, Dean was the one person that kept Cas from doing something he had thought of many times before:

            Taking his life.

            It would be so easy to end it right then and there. The idea had come to him when Cole was being an asshole and people were shouting homophobic comments to him from across the hall. The thought had certainly crossed his mind, but there was still something inside of Cas that wanted him to keep going.

            Hope.

            No matter how small the hope was, it was brewing inside of him. Cas still had hope for his life. One day, he would get married and have his own family, perhaps even with Dean. One day, homophobia would be a thing of the past and he could finally kiss Dean in public without receiving judgmental looks from the people around them. One day, he could return to the ‘real universe’ with Dean.

            But that day was not today.

            As the demon was twirling the knife around in her hands, Cas gulped and glanced over at Dean. He admired the subtle features of his face and let his gaze take in the bright green hue of his eyes one last time.

            “Dean…I love you,” he whispered quietly, barely loud enough for the other boy to hear him.

            Dean smiled weakly. “I love you, Cas. We’re gonna make it out of here.”

            The demon took a step closer. “How did you know we were at the restaurant?”

            Dean shook his head. “I had no idea, you crazy lady. Let us go!”

            She held up her hand, her powers making Dean wail in pain.

            “What did you just to do him?!” Cas demanded.

            “Teaching him to respect his kidnappers.”

            “I didn’t know you would be there! I just wanted a burger!” Dean shouted, clenching his jaw.

            “Alright, then. We’ll do this the hard way,” she muttered, lifting her hand higher. Right when she was about to move her wrist, the barn door flung open.

           A bright light came into view, illuminating the room. _“Am I dying?”_ Cas thought to himself, squinting against the harsh glow. A mist started to spray across the room, making the demons scream and shout in pain.

           A loud voice started to speak. _Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus_ _omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio_ _infernalis adversarii, omnis legio,_ _omnis congregatio et secta diabolica…”_

The voice sounded familiar, but Cas couldn’t manage to place it.

            The demons emerged from the room in a big puff of black smoke, only leaving behind their vessels. Cas whipped his head over to face Dean, breathing heavily. They looked forward once more and Dean’s eyes widened as a figure stalked through the glow of what Cas concluded were headlights.

            “Hey, Dean.”

            It was John Winchester.

            “D-Dad? What are you doing here?” Dean stammered.

            “I’m here to save you,” he replied, leaning forward and sawing through the thick ropes binding him to a pole. “You have to admit, spraying holy water was pretty cleaver.”

            Dean was soon able to get up, standing over his father in shock as he cut though Cas’ ropes. Both boys were now free.

            “I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you about my life as a hunter,” John explained. “What was I supposed to say? ‘Son, I hunt monsters for a living.’”

            They stood in silence, unsure of what to say. What were you supposed to say, after all, when your boyfriend’s homophobic father saved you from demons?

            John was first to break the silence. “I’m sorry, Castiel. It’s all my fault you boys left in the first place. If I had just made a better first impression, this would have never happened.”

            Cas’ expression was neutral; he wasn’t smiling or frowning. He was simply relieved now that he and Dean were safe. But at the same time, he was unsure of what would happen next. Were they going to go back home?

            John took a deep breath. “I’ve had a lot of time to think and I realize that what I did was wrong. If you guys truly love each other, then you deserve to be happy. I’m still trying to get used to all of this, but I will support you guys no matter what happens.”

            Dean nodded. “Thank you, Dad. It means a lot.”

            “Now, why don’t we go save some people and hunt some demons?”

 

* * *

 

            Cas peered over the edge of the wall, his heart racing with anticipation. It was the moment he had been waiting for. They were going to finally save Bobby.

            There were three bodies guarding Bobby and possibly more in the area. Cas grasped a silver blade in his palm as he attempted to relax his breathing, but he failed to do so.

            “John,” Cas hissed. “I don’t think these are demons…”

            John raised his eyebrows. “What do you think they are, then?”

            “Vampires,” Cas whispered, his gaze traveling along the many bags of blood along the walls. The dream Cas had experienced a few days earlier turned out to be a reality. Vampires, with the help of Crowley’s employees, had taken Bobby.

            “Ready?” John muttered.

            Dean nodded his head. Cas took a deep breath.

            They flung around the corner, revealing themselves to the unsuspecting creatures. The three vampires charged forward, making Cas’ heart beat even faster in his chest. He heard a slash and a head drop to the floor on his left, as well as Dean struggling on his right.

            Cas nearly forgot about the vampire charging straight at him. Cas staggered backward as they collided, his eyes widening as the vampire revealed his fangs. Cas let out a shriek.

            “Cas!” Dean wailed. “Kill him!”

            It was just like Cas had imagined it in his dream. A vampire was right in front of him, yet Cas couldn’t bring himself to take his blade and slash its neck. Something about killing made Cas squirm with discomfort. How could he ever do such a thing?

            “Cas!”

            He gulped, taking his blade and sliding it under the vampire’s chin. “I’m sorry,” Cas whispered. In the moment, it wasn’t directed at anyone in particular. Perhaps it was to himself?

            Cas finally slid his arm, slashing the vampire’s throat in a clean, swift motion as he watched the life fade from his body. The vampire’s eyes glossed over as his head slid to the floor and his body collapsed, blood oozing onto the hard floor. Cas felt liquid dripping from his fingers as he stared at the body in complete and utter shock.

            Cas had just killed someone.

            He felt his body convulse uncontrollably as everything blacked out around him.

 

 

* * *

 

 

            Cas jolted awake. He felt a hand running through his hair as his eye’s fluttered open. He was lying on his side with his head in Dean’s lap. They were in the backseat of an old black car, John driving in the front while Bobby rode in the passenger seat.

            “Hey, you’re awake,” Dean whispered as Cas turned onto his back, staring up into Dean’s eyes.

            “Yeah,” he murmured.

            “We saved Bobby.”

            “I can see that,” Cas replied, yawning.

            “How are you feeling?” Dean asked after a moment.

            Cas thought for a moment. “Alright, I guess. My head hurts.”

            “You passed out after you…you know, killed that vamp,” Dean explained. “I carried you back to the car and my dad grabbed Bobby.”

            Cas nodded as he absorbed the information. “Where are we going?”

            “We just left Bobby’s house and grabbed our things. We’re taking Bobby to a motel so he can get on the road tomorrow morning.”

            Cas furrowed his brow. “Why is he leaving?”

            “He needs to track down more of these vamps. They’re scattered all over the state. Plus, he needs to run from these demons on his trail.”

            Cas thought for a moment. “What about us? Where are we gonna stay?”

            Dean sighed. “My dad is taking us to a motel for the night. Sammy is already waiting for us there. Then, he’s gonna help us get back to the ‘real universe’. I explained everything to him and he told me I was crazy, but then he realized that it makes perfect sense. Things in this universe have been a little… _off_ lately and he suspected that something had happened. He’s gonna get us home.”

            Cas nodded, still drowsy. “Okay, Dean.”

            Dean felt a grin spread across his lips. “Are you tired?”

            Cas shook his head. “No…well, yes…”

            “Then get some rest, baby…” Dean whispered, placing a kiss on Cas’ forehead.

            Cas mumbled something before dozing off once more.

 

* * *

 

 

            When Cas woke, the room was illuminated by the soft glow of the sun. He felt much more refreshed now that he had gotten some rest. Cas’ head was still sore from the events of the night before, but it wasn’t nearly as bad.

           He squinted his eyes as he looked around the room. Dean must have carried Cas into the motel room that they were staying in for the night since Cas didn’t remember walking inside himself.

           Where was Dean, anyway? Cas let his eyes dart around the room until he felt an arm adjust faintly. He turned his head to see that Dean was lying beside him, pulling Cas close to his chest. Cas smiled drowsily and looked around once more.

            Sam was on the bed beside them and Cas couldn’t tell whether he was awake or not. He was still; not a muscle appeared to be moving. He looked so tiny with his body sprawled out on the large mattress. Cas searched for words to say, but he simply yawned instead.

            “Cas?”

            His eyes snapped back open. “Yes, Dean?”

            “Oh, you’re awake,” Dean whispered.

            “Mmhm,” Cas mumbled, turning so that he was now facing Dean.

            Dean smiled softly. “My dad went to get us breakfast.” He took his arm and wrapped it around Cas, pulling him closer.

            “What’s the agenda for today?” Cas asked curiously, trying to stay quiet so they wouldn’t wake Sam.

            “My dad is gonna see if there’s anything else he can find on the spell. When he woke up, there was a letter from Becky under the door to the room. She said there’s more info at the Men of Letters bunker in Lebanon.”

            “Lebanon?”

            “Lebanon, Kansas,” Dean explained. “We’re going on a road trip.”

            Cas furrowed his brow. “A road trip?”

            “It’ll be fun, Cas! Just us guys out there on the road together without anyone to tell us what to do. No school to worry about, either. Well, school doesn’t really matter, anyway, since this isn’t the real universe.”

            “I still think that’s all really confusing…”

            Dean laughed, pressing his lips against Cas’ forehead delicately. “We’ll figure it out. I promise.”

            “You make a lot of promises.”

            “But I always keep them, don’t I?” Dean grinned playfully.

            “Can you guys be any more gay, seriously?” Sam groaned, his voice muffled by the pillows and blankets piled over him. Cas and Dean broke into laughter in response.

            After lying in bed for a few more minutes, Cas decided to hop in the shower. As he stood in front of the bathroom mirror, he took in his appearance. His hair was ruffled and his bright blue eyes look tired. There was a cut on his forehead near his right temple and another one on his chin. He was still in his blood stained clothes from the night before, which made him shudder as he recalled the events.

            Cas’ shower only took about fifteen minutes. The hot water felt good against his sore back, the blood washing away from his body and disappearing into the drain. He rubbed his wet hands over his face, his wounds stinging slightly. Cas winched at the pain, stepping out of the shower and changing into some clean clothes.

            When he opened the door slowly, Dean was sitting on the bed with Sam and speaking to him in a soft voice.

            “You promise you won’t leave again?” Sam whimpered, tears rolling down his face.

            “I promise, Sammy. I will never do that again. Ever.”

            A smile broke out onto Cas’ face as he sat down across from them on the other bed.

            “Hi, Cas…” Sam mumbled, sniffling.

            “Hello Sam,” Cas greeted.

            “I’m gonna get in the shower,” Dean murmured, stepping out of the room and closing the bathroom door behind him.

            Cas and Sam were now alone together. It was awkward at first, but Sam soon spoke up.

            “Cas?”

            “Yes, Sam?”

            “Why do you love Dean?”

            Cas was taken aback at first, as he wasn’t sure how to reply. He just simply _did._ Falling in love with Dean was effortless; Cas loved everything about him. After thinking for a moment, Cas finally spoke. “Dean…he makes me feel like nobody else ever has. It’s like when I’m around him, he treats me like I’m the only person in the world. Everything about Dean is irresistible, from the way his green eyes sparkle in the morning and how he gets protective when someone is being a jackass. He has such a tough exterior, but deep down, there is so much more to—“

            “Okay, Cas,” Sam chuckled. “I understand.”

            Cas smiled, a bit embarrassed. They watched some television until Dean got out of the shower and it was time for Sam to get cleaned up.

            “How are you feeling?” Dean asked, sitting down next to him on their bed. He leaned his head against Cas’ shoulder.

            “Much better,” Cas admitted, taking is arms and wrapping then around Dean.

            Dean looked up to face Cas, his eyes flickering down at his lips. Cas loved it when Dean did that right before he was about to kiss him. Something about the way his eyes moved to look at him, no matter how simple the movement was, made Cas’ face heat up uncontrollably.

            “Please, Cas. No matter what, don’t forget me…the last thing I want is to live a life in the real universe where we don’t love each other. I…I just want you to remember,” Dean pleaded, his breaths quickening rapidly.

            “How could I ever forget?” Cas whispered against Dean’s mouth. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against Dean’s, feeling his body become engulfed with nothing but love for Dean.


	12. Twelve

            Once John returned, the boys packed their bags and walked out to the black 1967 Chevy Impala waiting for them in the parking lot. They were about to begin their journey to the bunker, which the four boys had never been to before.

            “I didn’t hear about this place until Becky mentioned it in the letter,” John admitted as he stuffed their bags into the trunk. “She claims that it contains a lot of information that we might find useful.”

            Cas nodded as Sam slid into the passenger seat. Dean opened the back door for Cas and they sat down and took a deep breath.

            “Ready?” Dean asked.

            Cas paused for a moment. “Yes.”

            The first few minutes were quiet, but Sam soon broke the silence.

“How much longer?” Sam groaned.

            “We’re only been in the car for twenty minutes. We still have five hours and thirty minutes left to drive. That’s three-hundred and thirty miles,” John muttered, keeping his eyes on the road.

            Cas sighed. This was going to be a long trip.

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

            They spent the next portion of the drive listening to music. John was shuffling between different rock songs Cas had never heard before, but Dean was constantly pointing out different bands as each song faded onto the speakers. He was glad that Dean was enjoying himself; he hadn’t seen Dean that giddy in a long time.

            “And that’s Back in Black! Oh, I really love this song, Cas!” Dean told him cheerfully.

            Cas couldn’t help but feel a smile spread across his face. “It’s…interesting.”

            Dean laughed and spent the next hour naming song after song. Cas eventually started recognizing bands and even occasional lyrics.

_“Cause the walls start shaking. The earth was quaking. My mind was aching. And we were making it. And you shook me all night long. Yeah you shook me all night long…”_

            They soon started to run low on gas, and after Dean insisting for nearly half an hour, they finally stopped at an old Gas-n-Sip off the highway. While Dean and Cas went inside to buy snacks, John filled up the tank and Sammy, who was now asleep, stayed in the car.

            Once the boys had located the empty bathroom, Cas walked inside and stood in front of the mirror. His gaze drifted over to the cuts on his face, making him wince.

            Dean stood next to him, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. “What’s wrong, Cas?” he asked, bringing his arms around Cas’ waist.

            Cas suddenly felt self-conscious. “My face…”

            Dean raised an eyebrow. “What about it?”

            Cas looked down, running his thumb across his fingernails. “It’s all messed up…”

            It took a minute for Dean to register what Cas was talking about. “Oh, Cas…You think a few cuts are gonna make me think of you differently?”

            Cas pressed his lips together as he inhaled deeply. “I…well, yes…”

            Dean turned Cas so that they were facing each other. “Baby, nothing will change the way I feel about you...” he reassured him, drawing his thumb along the cut on Cas’ chin. “They’ll heal soon enough. I don’t love you any less just because you got a little injured the other day.”

            “You promise?” Cas whimpered.

            “I promise. And I never break my promises, right?”

            Cas nodded and Dean leaned forward, pressing his lips against Cas’ gently.

            Once they were finished up in the bathroom, Cas and Dean picked out some snacks. They paid and soon found themselves back outside.

            “Back on the road,” Dean sighed.

            Cas looked around frantically. “I don’t think so…”

            The Impala was nowhere to be seen.

            Neither were John and Sam.

 

 

* * *

 

 

            They searched around the parking lot for what felt like hours, but once the sun began to set over the horizon, it finally set in that Sam and John were gone. Where they had gone was a mystery that neither boy knew the answer to.

            Dean called them for the tenth time in a row, but John didn’t pick up. Defeated, he plopped down on the curb. Cas sat next to him, wrapping his arm around him and pulling Dean closer. “We’re going to find them,” Cas reassured him.

            “What are we going to do?” Dean whispered, his head in his hands.

            “We can spend the night in a hotel. I’m pretty sure we have just enough money.”

            “But them what? We’re stuck in the middle of nowhere, Cas. What the hell are we supposed to do?!” Dean was starting to raise his voice, making Cas flinch.

            “I don’t know, De—“

            “You never know! Think, Cas! We’re all alone and we don’t know what the hell we’re supposed to do. We’re gonna starve and die out here alone if you don’t think of something!” He cursed under his breath. “Think of something!

            Cas could feel his eyes welling up with tears. He didn’t like being yelled at, especially by Dean. He hesitated before finally speaking. “Then you know what? If I’m so useless, then I’ll just leave.”

            Dean’s expression fell. “Wait, Cas, I—“

            Cas got up and started waking in the other direction towards a patch of trees. He wasn’t exactly sure where he going, but he just needed to get away from Dean. He wished they were still in Lawrence. He could imagine them curled up on Cas’ couch as they surfed through Netflix, Dean running his fingers through Cas’ hair. If he closed his eyes long enough, it almost felt real. But Cas knew that he couldn’t keep living inside his head forever.

            “Cas, please, wait—“ Dean snatched his arm and Cas yanked it away.

            “Let go of me!” he demanded through gritted teeth, turning to face him. There were tears streaming down both of their faces as they stood alone in the cold field beside the gas station.

            “Cas, I’m sorry. I screwed up,” Dean pleaded, sniffling.

            Cas simply blinked, tears clouding his vision.

            “Don’t go. You promised you would never leave me,” Dean cried, his bottom lip quivering. Cas had never seen Dean cry like this before, which made Cas sob even harder.

            “I’m sorry, Dean,” he told him, stepping forward and collapsing into his arms. “I screwed up, too. I…I just want to go to the hotel and get some rest. Then, we can find your dad and get to the bunker.”

            After letting Cas cry for a bit, Dean slid his forefinger under Cas’ chin and lifted his head so that they were gazing into each other’s eyes. Without any notice, he leaned forward and kissed Cas like he had never done before. It was as if every emotion flowing through Dean’s veins was pumped into Cas as their lips pressed together, Dean tracing the outline of Cas’ jaw with his finger. “I love you…” Dean whispered against his lips as he brought his hand behind Cas’ head for stability.

            “I love you, too, Dean,” Cas murmured.

            “I promise I won’t ever yell at you. It’s all my fault…”

            “Shh…” Cas whispered. They kissed for a while until Cas felt himself begin to feel a bit drowsy. “Can we please go get some rest now?”

            Dean nodded, his eyes filled with admiration. “Of course, baby.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

            One fake I.D. and ninety bucks later, the boys had a hotel room. It was seven thirty and both boys were exhausted and ready to rest.

            When they finally reached the room, Dean slid the key card through the slot. He opened their door, revealing a large queen bed in the middle with a small couch on the side. Dean rushed inside and plopped on the bed, letting out a sigh of relief. Cas followed him, closing the door as he ran over to Dean and fell beside him.

            “This is nice,” Dean sighed as Cas curled up around him.

            “Mmhm…” he murmured into Dean’s chest.

            “Are you hungry?” Cas asked after a moment.

            “A little. We should probably get something cheap, though. We just blew a lot of our money,” Dean mumbled.

            “Taco bell?” Cas suggested.

            Dean shrugged. “Sounds good to me.”

            Cas suddenly realized something. “We should probably get some toothbrushes and stuff. John has our bags…”

            Dean groaned. “That’s right. So first we can stop by Wal-Mart, then Taco Bell?”

            “Sure,” Cas agreed.

            They got up and headed on their journey to Wal-Mart, which was conveniently located across the street. Cas began typing a list of things they would need.

            “Toothbrushes, toothpaste, phone chargers if they aren’t too expensive, deodorant, a notebook—“

            Dean raised his eyebrows. “A notebook?”

            “If we’re going to be stranded in the middle of nowhere, I’m going to document the whole thing. Maybe it’ll even be made into a book!” Cas gleamed.

            Dean chuckled, rolling his eyes playfully. “Fine. But we’ll also need some basic food. Pie, bread, crackers, peanut butter…”

            “Pie?” Cas laughed.

            “I friggin’ love pie! You should know that by now,” Dean teased.

            Cas shook his head, chuckling as he grabbed a cart. They started throwing many things inside as they went through isle after isle, picking out the bare necessities. Lastly, they grabbed a basic thirty dollar backpack to carry it all in. Cas winced when he calculated the total price.

            “We still have enough money,” Dean reassured him after they paid for their things. “I still have $176.78 left. I got some of that from Bobby, some from my dad, and the rest is from mowing lawns over the summer.”

            “And I have $166.33 from my allowance and helping out at the library,” Cas replied. “In all, I think we have around $343.11 to last us until we find John and Sam.”

            Dean nodded, taking a deep breath before rolling the cart back with the others. Once they got outside, Cas started loading their things into the backpack, picking specific locations for everything. He was very organized, even if they were struggling to survive on their own.

            “Ready?” Dean hummed, taking Cas’ hand.

            “Yup,” Cas nodded as they headed off to their next location: Taco Bell.

            “What’s your favorite food, Cas?” Dean asked curiously.

            Cas thought for a moment. He knew that Dean liked pie, but Cas had never given his favorite food much thought. After pondering for a while, Cas finally made his mind. “Pork rinds.”

            Dean raised an eyebrow. “Pork rinds? Seriously?”

            Cas looked down awkwardly. “Yeah.”

            Dean laughed playfully. “Well, then. That’s great to know.”

            They continued walking, their clasped hands swinging with every step they took. The tow boys soon reached Taco Bell, their stomachs piercing with hunger.

            “I’m craving a bean burrito,” Cas sighed.

            “I want a quesarito.”

            “A what?”

            “It’s a quesadilla and a bean burrito in one. They’re the best!” Dean chuckled.

            Cas shook his head and laughed as Dean opened the door for him. The restaurant was empty with music playing softly in the background, since it was already nine o’clock.

            They walked up to the register, their hands still clasped tightly together. An employee soon walked up to assist them, his eyes darting down a few times. He appeared to be mildly surprised at the sight of two guys holding hands; it didn’t seem like it was typically seen much in Omaha, which just so happened to be the city the boys were stranded in.

            “I’ll have a quesarito and one bean burrito,” Dean told him.

            “With no onions,” Cas added.

            Dean looked over at him and raised his eyebrows in amusement. “And two medium drinks.”

            The employee nodded as Dean pulled out his wallet.

            “Dean,” Cas whined. “I can pay for it.”

            “No, I can take care of it. I have more money,” Dean insisted.

            “Dean, it’s—“

            Dean handed the money over and Cas rolled his eyes playfully. They made their way over to the drinks, Cas filling his cup with lemonade and Dean getting coke.

“Where do you wanna sit?” Dean asked.

Cas thought for a moment before leading them to a secluded booth in the corner with a view of Wal-Mart through the window. “How about here?”

            Dean nodded and sat across from Cas, lightly tapping his fingers on his cup. Cas slid the backpack off of his back and set it down beside him.

            “Today has been a crazy day,” Cas sighed, his finger grazing the wound on his face. It felt like it was finally healing, but Cas still managed to wince from the pain.

            “Yeah,” Dean agreed, sliding his hand across the table and lacing his fingers with Cas’ hand. “But it’ll be nice to have some time to ourselves again. It’s just the two of us, all alone. Can’t be too bad, right?”

            Cas grinned. “I guess not.”

            Their food was soon done, and due to them being the only customers in the entire restaurant, one of the employees were kind enough to bring the food directly to their table. After muttering a thank you, Cas and Dean wolfed down their food in famished bites as if they hadn’t eaten in years.

            “That was—“ Cas was soon caught off by a high-pitched hiccup.

            Dean busted out into a fit of laughter as Cas hiccupped once more.

            “What?” Cas questioned, furrowing his brow and narrowing his eyes.

            “You sound like a sneezing kitten! Dean teased.

            “It happens when I eat fast…” Cas muttered, looking down.

            “It’s adorable,” he laughed once more as Cas struggled to keep a straight face. How could he even pretend to be angry when Dean laughed? Dean’s smile lit up the entire room when he walked in, so it was nearly impossible to do such a thing. Cas soon found himself laughing as well, hiccupping a few more times.

            They got up, throwing their trash away and embarking on the short journey to their hotel. As they walked, Cas was still hiccupping.

            “Do you need me to scare you?” Dean joked, wrapping his arm around Cas’ waist.

            “No,” Cas mumbled, a grin spreading over his lips. He jumped slightly as Dean’s phone started to right. They stopped walking and Dean pulled away.

            Dean, who was quite puzzled by this, pulled the device out of his pocket and put it on speakerphone. “Hello?”

            “Dean?”

            He glanced up with Cas in surprise. “Dad?”

            “Yes,” John responded. “I’m sorry we left you back there.”

            “What the hell?!” Dean hissed. “Why didn’t you answer any of my calls?”

            “We were cornered by demons at the gas station. We didn’t have much of a choice but to leave. I had to protect Sam.”

            “You could have said something!” Dean spat.

            “Look, I’m sorry. Just book a hotel for the—“

            “We already did,” Dean muttered.

            “Good. Don’t worry; I’ll pay you back. We’ll come get you and Cas in the morning, okay?”

            Dean rolled his eyes. “Okay. Bye.”

            “Bye,” John replied before hanging up.

            Cas was somewhat relieved that they weren’t stranded in Omaha forever. They weren’t going to die and they weren’t going to run out of money.

            “I can’t believe he did that!” Dean explained, astonished. “It’s just like him to just run off like that without me!”

            Cas brought an arm around Dean in attempts to comfort him. “Calm down, okay? He had a valid reason. We’ll see them tomorrow morning, remember?”

            Dean nodded. “You’re right. Let’s just enjoy the time we have together.”

            Cas learned forward and pressed his lips gingerly on Dean’s mouth. “We’re gonna be okay, I promise. And I always keep my promises, just like you.”

            Dean smiled, leaning his head on Cas’ shoulder. “Yes, you do.”

            “Well, on the bright side, my hiccups are gone!” Cas announced cheerfully.

            Dean laughed, kissing him passionately as their hotel came into view.


	13. Thirteen

May 6, 2015

Day 1

9:47 pm

 

            Dean and I have been stranded in Omaha for a few hours now. I have to admit…it has actually been very fun. Dean has an adventurous personality that makes all of this a much more enjoyable experience.

            We went to Wal-Mart to stock up on necessities and ate a very late dinner at Taco Bell. Dean made fun of my hiccups, which he claims are adorable…

            Now we are back in the hotel. It isn’t very fancy, but I like it. All that matters is that I get to be alone with Dean. I can kiss him and be affectionate with him without anyone giving us weird looks. He seems to have gotten used to people staring at us in public, but I’m still adjusting. I don’t see why people feel the need to give us a weird look if I peck him on the cheek. So what if I am gay and Dean is bi? Why should anyone look down on us for that?

            Anyway, Dean is coming out of the bathroom now and I don’t like him looking over my shoulder as I write, so I will have to end this one here. I will write more when I get the chance.

-Cas

 

 

            “Whatcha writin’ Cas?” Dean asked curiously as Cas slid his notebook shut.

            “Nothing…just about what we did today,” Cas replied.

            Dean grinned. He sat on the bed while Cas swiveled around in the desk chair that conveniently came with the room. A lamp on the desk and another on the nightstand illuminated the room. It was almost 10:00 pm and both boys were fairly tired.

            “Did you have fun?” Dean asked.

            Cas nodded. “It was great, getting to be with you. It’s been a while since we have been alone together.”

            Dean nodded, a smile still plastered on his face as he looked down at the floor. “Yeah, it has been a while.”

            They sat in silence for a while until Cas said something. “What do you think the ‘real universe’ is like?”

            Dean looked up and pressed his lips together. “Well,” he began. “We won’t really know until we get there. Hopefully it isn’t nearly as bad as it is here in this universe.”

            “Dean?”

            “Yeah?”

            “We were a really good team back there when we attacked those vampires…”

            “Yeah, I agree,” Dean replied, his smile fading as he noticed Cas’ expression. “What’s wrong?

            Cas took a deep breath. “I mean, we already knew how to fight. What person just wakes up one morning and suddenly knows how to fight? Sure, we did train a bit, but that was only for a few days. What if we _hunt_ for a living in the ‘real universe’? Has that ever crossed your mind?”

            Dean thought for a moment before nodding slightly. “I’ve thought about it. When I hunt, there’s this… _feeling_ that I get, you know? Like hunting is what I’m meant to do. I can’t see myself working your typical nine to five job, not making a difference in this world. By hunting, I can save people, Cas. I can actually try and save this terrible world we live in.”

            Cas tilted his head to the side as he took in what Dean was expressing. He could certainly see Dean being a hunter. Dean was brave and strong; nothing got in his way. Cas, on the other hand, could hardly bring himself to kill one vampire. What would Cas do in the “real universe”? Would he live a simple life with a typical, boring job? Or would he fight monsters beside Dean and save lives?

            “Cas?”

            “Hey…Cas?”

            Cas snapped himself back from his thoughts. “Huh?”

            “You alright?” Dean asked, a puzzled expression on his face.

            “Well…yes, I’m fine,” Cas sighed. “I was thinking about what I was going to do in the real universe.”

            Dean nodded. “What do you think?”

            Cas shook his head. “I don’t know. The last thing I want to do is have a simple life with a boring job. I want to change something, too, in this world that we’re stuck with. Most of all, I want to be with you…”

            Dean’s expression lit up warmly. “That’s what I want, too. I want to spend the rest of time curled up with you in bed and making breakfast for you in the morning. I just want to kiss you ‘cause you’ll love me unconditionally and I’ll do the same. I just want us to be happy. Together.”

            Cas felt his face heat up, a grin breaking out along his lips. “That’s all I want.”

 

* * *

 

 

 

            They spent the rest of the night watching Scrubs on Dean’s phone. At around eleven thirty, Cas could feel himself becoming drowsy. He was fighting sleep, afraid of what dreams may come if he closed his eyes.

            His dreams were frightening anymore and Cas wasn’t sure if he could handle it much longer. They were almost always about him having to kill something and Dean dying in the process. Each dream was more and more difficult for Cas to handle. He found himself snapping awake, wanting to yell and scream in horror after every nightmare.

            Now, he was alone with Dean and trying to not fall asleep at all, anxious for what consequences may come if he closed his eyes for even a moment. Sure, he would be exhausted tomorrow, but it was much better than having his subconscious mind concoct something completely and utterly terrifying as he attempted to rest. Cas almost drifted asleep multiple times, but he refused to let his tired eyes shut.

            “Cas,” Dean whispered. “You can fall asleep, you know…”

            Cas shook his head. “Dean…you don’t understand.”

            Dean furrowed his brow, pausing the episode and setting his phone down. “What’s going on?”

            “The dreams…”  


            “What about them?”

            Cas took a shallow breath. “I’m still having them.”

            Dean frowned with a sigh. “Cas…I’m sorry. What have you been dreaming about? You haven’t exactly told me yet…”

            Cas hesitated, parting his jaw to speak time after time, but he could never bring himself to utter a word.

            “Is it about… _me?_ ” Dean asked with a worried expression plastered across his face.

            Cas nodded, letting out a small, helpless whimper.

            “What about me?” Dean whispered, bringing his arms around Cas and pulling him closer.

            “In my dreams, I…I’m always trying to kill something, but I just _can’t_ , Dean. I want to save people, I really do, but I just can’t bring myself to draw a knife into someone’s flesh and feel the life seep out of them. In every dream, the thing I’m trying to kill gets away and…” Cas choked on his words as he felt his heart race in his chest.

            “And what?” Dean asked, raising his eyebrows. He brought his hand along Cas’ arm comfortingly.

            “And then…you die. Every time.”

            “Oh…” Dean mumbled.

            “And I can’t bear to see you that way, Dean. It’s horrible! Seeing the one you love bleeding on the floor, their eyes glossing over…it’s heartbreaking, even if it’s just a dream.”

            “Cas, I promise, nothing is going to happen to me,” Dean reassured him. “I’m fine. I’m not gonna die; I’m not gonna disappear. I’m here to stay. I’m never gonna leave you, baby. I promise.”

            “Are you sure?” Cas whispered.

            “I never break my promises,” Dean mumbled, leaning forward and pressing their lips together.

            It was a passionate kiss, but just like every other time Cas and Dean locked lips, it soon evolved into much more. Dean was running his fingers through Cas’ dark hair. Cas had shifted so that he was now sitting on Dean’s lap, his knees settled gently on either side of Dean’ hips. Cas brought his hand along Dean’s arm and let his gaze flutter over their hands as their fingers interlaced. He pulled away and looked up at Dean, absorbing his pulsating green eyes.

            Dean let his gaze drift down below Cas’ nose, Cas biting his lip in response. It felt odd the first time he had done that, but by now, Cas knew that he had mastered the maneuver once he caught the yearning look in Dean’s expression. Dean leaned forward, locking their lips together roughly. It initially caught Cas off guard, but he soon eased into the movement of their synchronized mouths.

            Cas let a moan seep through his lips as he drew his hand along Dean’s firm chest. Dean, full of lust and desire, let his arms travel down to Cas waist. Cas pulled away to gasp for air, feeling Dean’s hot breath against his mouth. Cas pressed their foreheads together, cupping his hands around Dean’s face. They stayed like that for a moment, breathlessly staring into each other’s eyes until Dean leaned forward once more. Dean grabbed a fistful of his shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it effortlessly across the room.

            Dean let his hand trail down to Cas’ thigh, sliding along his hips tenderly. Cas felt his entire body go limp, his cheeks flushed and warm. Cas sucked Dean’s bottom lip, his hand splayed out across Dean’s bare chest.

            Dean melted in Cas’ arms, his breathing warm and deep. “Cas…” he rasped, inhaling sharply as his fingers slid under the hem of Cas’ shirt.

            “Shh…” Cas whispered, his lips red and swollen. He slid down so that Dean was now pinned against the mattress, blinking as he watched Dean’s chest rise and fall steadily. He was hovering over him, Cas’ breath warm and languid against Dean’s collarbone. He pressed soft kisses along his neck and chest and could feel Dean’s soothing heartbeat against his lips.

            “Cas…” he whimpered. Cas looked up at him, but Dean simply nodded his head. “Keep…going,” Dean choked, his breathing quickening in his chest. Cas pressed another kiss, this time on his chest, letting his hand graze over every inch of his skin.

            Once they were both tired and breathing heavily, Cas curled up against Dean and rested his arm along Dean’s waist.

            “Where the hell did you learn to kiss like that?” Dean panted, pulling Cas closer.

            Cas smirked, closing his eyes and drifting off into a deep slumber.

 

 

* * *

 

 

            “Cas! Cas, please! Cas!”

            He whipped his head around in search of the voice.

            “Dean! Hold on!” Cas raced around the abandoned building, following the voice as it grew louder and louder. It didn’t help that every noise echoed, bouncing off the walls and throwing Cas off.

            “Cas!” Dean wailed, letting out an ear-piercing screech. “Help!”

            Cas raced up and down countless flights of stairs, growing frustrated with every burning moment. “Dean, I’m coming!” He stumbled, tears streaming violently down his face.

            When he reached the top of the stairs, Dean finally came into view. He was tied up to a pole, blood gushing out of countless wounds. Cas felt his stomach lurch at the sight. “Dean!” he wailed, throwing himself onto his knees and sawing through the ropes with a knife.

            Once Dean was free, Cas leaned forward and pulled him close. “You’re safe now,” he whispered, his face soaked with tears. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”

            Cas stood up and offered his hand for support, but Dean shook his head. “My leg…” he muttered, wincing in pain. Cas nodded, kneeling down and slipping an arm under his knees and around his shoulders. He braced himself before attempting to lift him, failing miserably.

            Cas frantically searched his mind for what to do, but Dean grasped his hand around Cas wrist and let out a staggering breath. “Cas…I’m not....gonna…make it.”

            “No,” Cas grumbled, trying to lift him once more.

            “Cas, I’m dying,” Dean whispered, tears washing some of the blood from his cheeks. “Please…just stay with me.”

            “No, I can’t do that to you,” Cas told him, choking back a sob.

            “I love you,” Dean uttered, his eyes fluttering shut as every sign of life faded away from his body.

            “No!” Cas screamed. “Please, God, no! Dean!” He threw himself onto Dean’s limp body, grabbing a fistful of his jacket. He let out another wail, his face burning with pain. “No…” he repeated, quivering into the ground. Cas’ body was convulsing and gasping for air.

            “Cas?”

            “Cas! Please, baby, calm down.”

            “Cas, you’re dreaming. Baby, wake up!”

            His eyes snapped open as he staggered for air. When Cas’ gaze fell over Dean, he let out a wail. “Dean!”

            Dean brought him closer, pressing his lips to Cas’ forehead. “Shh…everything is going to be okay. I’m here. I’ll always be here.”


	14. Fourteen

            The next morning, Cas woke to find Dean’s arm wrapped around him. The sight brought a smile to Cas’ face as he yawned, adjusting to the brightness of the room. Today, they would _hopefully_ be heading to the bunker, unless there were more surprises. Cas hoped that nothing would get in the way. He wanted to focus on getting back to the ‘real universe’ now that they had taken care of Bobby.

            His dreams were starting to get better. While Cas still had a nightmare, it was the only time he had dreamed that entire night. He felt refreshed and finally back to normal. Those dreams seemed to be draining him of any energy he managed to have left, but he was now awake and ready for the day.

            Cas felt Dean stir beside him, letting out a drowsy groan. “What time is it?” he muttered, bringing Cas closer.

            He turned around to face Dean, still grinning as he checked his phone. “Nine o’clock,” Cas replied, setting the device back on the nightstand as he yawned once more. “What time will John be here?”

            Dean sighed. “Eleven. He wants to be on the road by eleven fifteen.”

            Cas nodded. “Sounds great.”

            They stayed in bed for a few minutes before Cas made his way to the bathroom. Closing the door behind him, he took a short glance at his reflection in the mirror. His wounds were getting much better, but they were still noticeable.

            He got in the shower, the hot water soothing him as it rolled down his back. Cas was so calm that he nearly forgot that he was stranded in Omaha. If he concentrated enough, it almost felt like he was back at home.

            Once he stepped out of the shower, he realized he didn’t have a clean outfit since all of their belongings were in the trunk of the Impala. He cringed at the thought of putting on dirty clothes, but he soon got over it.

            After changing back into his clothing from the day before, he stared at his reflection for a moment. He almost didn’t recognize himself; Cas had changed so much since they had left Lawrence. He looked more mature and like he had grown up very fast those past few weeks. There was a part of him that missed his old life (or what the spell had led him to believe was his life) and another part that was longing to move on, longing to explore. Longing to be with Dean.

            He finally stepped out of the bathroom, giving Dean the opportunity to shower. Plopping down on the bed, Cas scrolled on his phone for a bit. He didn’t have any social media (who would follow him other than Dean, anyway?) or anyone to text, so he simply stared at the screen.

            Once Dean was finally finished, he rolled onto bed beside Cas. It was ten o’clock, so they still had plenty of time before John would arrive. “Hungry?” Dean asked, sliding off the bed to dig in the backpack for something to eat.

            Cas nodded vigorously as Dean tossed him a granola bar. “Hopefully my dad will stop for food on the way, since we don’t have much time to walk somewhere for breakfast.”

            “Mmhm,” Cas hummed, taking a large bite. They ate in silence for a moment until Dean tossed his wrapper into the trashcan and curled up next to Cas.

            “Are you gonna get the hiccups again?” Dean smirked playfully as he peered up at Cas’ blue eyes.

            Cas laughed, shaking his head. “Not this time, hopefully.”

            Sure enough, Cas soon erupted into a hiccupping fit, his chest rising and falling unsteadily.

            Dean began cracking up while Cas glared at him. “You’re adorable,” Dean whispered, pressing his lips against Cas’ forehead. That brought a smile to Cas’ face as Dean rested his head on his chest.

            Cas brought his arm around Dean, resting it on the small of his back. “Scrubs?” Dean suggested, grabbing his phone from beside him. Cas nodded and they watched a couple of episodes before they heard a knock on the door.

            Dean shot up from the bed as Cas paused their show. Dean opened the door, Sam and John stepping inside. After exchanging somewhat awkward greetings, Sam gave Dean a hug. It brought another grin to Cas’ face.

            John’s gaze swept over the unmade bed before making eye contact with Cas. Cas was unsure if he should look away or not, but he simply smiled.

            “Sorry about leaving you guys alone yesterday,” John apologized after a moment, patting Dean on the back.

            “Don’t worry about it,” Dean replied, slipping the backpack over his back. “We were fine.” He grinned at Cas, making him blush slightly.

            John raised his eyebrows before straightening his back and parting his jaw to speak. “Ready?”

            Cas nodded, getting up and meeting them at the door. After giving the room a quick glance, they stepped into the hallway and headed toward the car. The walk there was silent and somewhat awkward.

            Once they arrived at the car, Sam and Dean slipped into their usual seats, but John didn’t sit down. Instead, he made his way over to the other side of the car, making Cas freeze in anticipation.

            “Castiel, well _Cas_ ,” John began, leaning against the car. He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry about how I’ve treated you. I’m not used to Dean being with…. you know, a _guy,_ so I’m still trying to figure this all out.”

            Cas nodded. “That’s understandable.”

            “But I’m sorry for kicking you guys out. That was a terrible thing to do. I can’t believe I ever treated you guys like that…”

            “Don’t worry about it,” Cas told him. “It’s in the past, right? There’s no need to dwell on things that have already happened.”

            John smiled weakly before patting Cas on the back. “You’re right,” he replied. “We should probably get on the road now.”

            “Right,” Cas agreed, sliding into the backseat of the Impala.

            Dean exchanged a worried glance. “What did he say?”

            “He said he was sorry for being so judgmental,” Cas told him, a grin eventually making its way to his lips.

            Dean broke out into a smile as well, leaning forward to press his lips against Cas’ forehead. “I knew he would come around eventually.”

            Cas smiled even more, placing his hand over Dean’s and lacing their fingers together.

            Sam groaned in the front seat. “Get a room, you two.”

            Cas and Dean laughed, rolling their eyes playfully as Dean leaned forward and pecked Cas on the cheek one last time before they headed off to the bunker.

 

 

* * *

 

 

            They had been on the road for about six hours and Cas thought he was going to loose his mind. Breakfast had lasted a long longer than they expected due to issues with their food, so they weren’t on the road until one. They had stopped multiple times for food and bathroom breaks, along with traffic and road construction in Omaha. The trip, which should have only taken two hours so far, was terrible. They were even having issues with the car, which was certainly not good. It was already seven o’clock and Cas was beginning to feel restless.

            “We’re finally more than halfway there!” Sam exclaimed after they passed another sign along the highway. “I can’t wait to see what it looks like! It’s supposed to have a bunch of books and be underground. Nobody really even knows it exists.”

            Cas smiled in amusement at Sam’s enthusiasm. Dean was asleep, his head resting in Cas’ lap. Dean wasn’t getting much sleep due to Cas’ persistent nightmares, which made Cas frown as he ran his fingers through Dean’s hair. He had never really felt his hair before, now that he though of it. It was soft and a light brown almost blonde color.

            Cas was looking forward to finally arriving at the bunker. He hated being in the car for extended periods of time. There wasn’t much to do on trips, since there was terrible phone reception when they were driving in the middle of nowhere. He couldn’t write or read or he would get carsick and there wasn’t any music to listen to in the car other than rock. Cas didn’t really mind rock music, but since John played the same three albums on repeat the whole ride, it soon got very old.

            Cas leaned back, closing his eyes. He wasn’t too terribly tired, but a nap wouldn’t hurt. Just as Cas was finally drifting asleep, he heard a noise in the front seat. His eyes snapped open as his gaze trailed over John.

            John muttered something under his breath, pulling over to the side of the road. “We’re out of gas…”

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “Completely?”

            John nodded angrily. “Completely.” He smacked the dashboard, making Cas flinch. “I’ll have to walk to the nearest station. Who knows how far it is, anyway?”

            Cas shrugged as he felt Dean stir awake beside him. “What’s going on?” Dean murmured, his eyes blinking with concern.

            “We’re out of gas…” Cas mumbled.

            “What?” Dean snapped, his head popping up to take a look around. “What the hell? We’re supposed to be in Lebanon by now. We should have been there hours ago.”

            “Traffic,” John groaned. “Lots of road construction.”

            Dean shook his head. “Well, is someone gonna walk to the gas station or what?”

            John rolled his eyes. “I’m going. You guys need to stay in the car, okay? I should be back soon. Hopefully…”

            The three boys nodded as John set off on the long journey. They were in the middle of nowhere and it would be getting dark soon. Cas sighed heavily, closing his eyes and leaning back.

            “Cas?” Dean called quietly.

            “Yes, Dean?”

            “Do you think we’re ever gonna make it to the bunker?” Dean mumbled with an unusual tone in his voice.

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “Of course. We should be there tonight.” _Hopefully._

            “’Cause we’ve been driving for ages now and something always keeps coming up.” Dean was silent for a moment. Cas could sense that he was in deep thought. “What if we’re meant to stay here? Forever?”

            Cas shook his head. “No. We’re getting to the ‘real universe’, Dean. I promise.”

            Dean rolled onto his back and stared up at Cas. From that angle, he looked much younger and innocent. “Do you break your promises?” Dean asked, his eyes gleaming like a small child.

            Cas could no longer fight a grin from spreading over his face. “I don’t believe so.”

            Dean grinned as well. “Good.”

            They spent the next hour and a half talking about what they would do at the bunker and how they would set up their room.

            “Can you believe it, Cas? We’re finally gonna have our own room. It’ll be great to not have to move around anymore.”

            Cas nodded. “Definitely.” He was still running his fingers through Dean’s soft hair.

            It was now seven o’clock and the sun was starting to set in the horizon. John’s trip was taking much longer than anticipated. Cas sighed once more.

            Sam was snoring in the front seat, so Cas and Dean were technically alone in the car. By now, the two boys were sitting beside each other, Cas leaning his shoulder against Dean.

            There was a thought constantly popping up in Cas’ mind, but he wasn’t exactly sure how to say it. After hesitating for a while, he finally spoke.

            “Dean?”

            “Yeah, Cas?”

            “When did you find out you liked guys?”

            Dean’s expression changed drastically as he pondered. Cas could feel himself bristling with anticipation.

            “I don’t know, Cas. I’ve always kinda had a feeling. I mean, I like girls, too, but there have always been guys that I’ve taken second glances at when they walk by, you know? And when I first saw you in science, I told myself I wasn’t, you know, bi. I was a perfectly normal straight guy who moved around a lot. But after a while, I realized that I had to stop lying to myself. That just isn’t healthy.”

            It was a lot for Cas to take in. After a moment of fairly awkward silence, Dean spoke again.

            “What about you, Cas?”

            Cas took a moment to think. “Well, when I was younger and all of my friend were having crushes on girls, I was the friend who just never liked anyone. When someone asked me who I liked, I always came up with a dumb excuse like, ‘I’m not allowed to date’ or something like that. I started noticing guys, though, when I was walking in the hallway at school or somewhere else in public. I thought something was wrong with me. But just like you, I forced myself to push those thoughts away. Lying to yourself is the biggest slap in the face. It eats you up inside.”

            Cas turned to see if Dean was still listening. When he verified that he was, he continued.

            “Finally, I just accepted who I was. I stood in front of the mirror one day and said it. ‘I’m gay.’ It felt good, yet odd at the same time. I wasn’t sure what to do after that. I haven’t officially come out to anyone yet. The people who know right now just kind of found out, I suppose. Like you.”

            Dean nodded. “Same here…I mean, I told Sam a few days after I met you and realized how I felt. He was really supportive, but I knew my dad was homophobic and there was no point in saying anything.”

            “Yeah…” Cas said quietly.

            They waited in the car for a few more hours, but John was still gone. Cas assumed that the walk was just farther than they had originally thought, but deep in his mind, he started to wonder if demons had gotten him. Cas started to feel anxious as the sky around them became dark.

            “Cas?”

            “Yes, Dean?”

            “Are you okay?”

            Cas shrugged, looking over at Dean curled up beside him. By now, they were laying out in the backseat, Sam still asleep in the front. “I’m fine,” he mumbled. “I just want to get back on the road, that’s all.”

            “I know,” Dean agreed. “But there’s not much we can do, you know?”

            Cas sighed. “I know.”

            They sat in silence for a moment before Dean spoke up. “I have an idea.”

            Cas perked up. “What is it?”

            “Come here,” Dean instructed, slipping out the door and holding it open for Cas.

            Cas, as puzzled as he was, followed Dean out of the car and onto the grass. It felt odd to be outside; they had been stranded inside the car for ages.

            Dean popped the trunk, searching around in the back. He pulled out a single blanket and set it out over the grass.

            Cas raised his eyebrows. “What are we doing?”

            Dean grinned, an impish expression making its way up his face. “You’ll see.” He got down onto his knees, lying down on the blanket. Rolling onto his back, Dean put his hands behind his head and stared up at the sky. “Come on, Cas.”

            Cas followed Dean’s lead, lying beside him. Dean brought an arm around Cas and pulled him closer as they looked up at the tiny specks of white dotting the sky. “We’re so far away from the city that we can actually see stars,” Dean told him, his voice soft.

            “It’s amazing…” Cas mumbled, his eyes gazing up at the sky. It was remarkable that something this beautiful existed millions of miles away from earth. He wanted the moment to last forever, wrapped up in Dean’s arms as they stared up at the enthralling night sky pictured above them.

            “Do you think the stars are the same back home?” Cas asked after a moment.

            Dean nodded. “I’m sure they are. But as long as you’re with me, I don’t mind if they’re different.”

            Cas felt a rosy blush make its way to his cheeks.

            “That sounded really cheesy,” Dean chuckled.

            Cas smiled happily, closing his eyes as he sighed into Dean’s chest. “I don’t mind…”


	15. Fifteen

            There was a loud noise in the front of the car, making Cas jump slightly. His eyes snapped open as he whipped his head around, searching around frantically.

            Once Cas and Dean were starting to feel drowsy after stargazing, they decided to go back to the Impala and get some rest. Dean offered to stay up and keep watch in case a stranger approached them while they were stranded, but he had obviously fallen asleep.

            Cas was relieved when he saw that John, who was finally back from retrieving the gas, had caused the noise in the front seat.

            “Alright,” John mumbled, Sam’s eyes fluttering open beside him. “Ready to go?”

            All three boys nodded eagerly as John started the car. They were finally back on the road.

            The first few moments were silent until Dean spoke up. “What took you so long?”

            “The gas station was pretty far away. We’re pretty much in the middle of nowhere,” John explained.

            Cas gazed up at the moon, tuning out all the noise around him. It was shining vibrantly in the sky just like any other night. He wondered if Chuck ever looked up at the moon when he was alone at night or if he even thought of Cas.

            “Cas?”

            He turned his head as he was shaken from his thoughts by Dean’s voice. “Mmhm?” he hummed.

            "Are you alright?” Dean asked, furrowing his brow.

            “Yeah. Just thinking…” he replied, leaning back against Dean drowsily.

            "You should get some rest,” Dean suggested, bringing his arm around to pull Cas to his chest.

            “Okay, Dean…” he mumbled, soon finding himself in a deep slumber.

 

 

* * *

 

 

            When Cas woke, they were pulling up to an unfamiliar hill. On one side, there were steps leading down to a small door. Puzzled, Cas sat up and narrowed his eyes. “Where are we?” he thought aloud, looking over at Dean.

            “The bunker,” John replied.

            “It doesn’t look very fancy…” Sam muttered.

            “It is inside,” John reassured him, stepping out of the car door. The boys followed his lead as they walked over to the door. They stopped at the edge of the stairs. John pulled a key out of his pocket and stuck it through the lock.

            Their footsteps were weary as they made their way down the stairs. John pulled the door open to reveal an initially unimpressive room. It was pitch dark and impossible to see anything. Did they seriously spend days trying to get to such a boring place?

            “Hold on,” John instructed, pulling out a flashlight and making his way inside. They waited patiently for a few minutes as John stumbled around the dark room. There was a loud click and the entire bunker was illuminated.

            The bunker was a lot bigger than Cas had expected. There were countless books and a ton of doors that led to unknown rooms. He couldn’t wait to explore and see what he could possibly find.

            He turned to look at Sam, who was mesmerized by the sight. Dean was in complete and utter shock and Cas, whose eyes were now bulging with excitement, was dying to check it out.

            “We’re safe from pretty much everything here, so there’s no need to worry about sleeping with a gun,” John told them. “I’ll take my own room and Sam can have his own as well. You guys—“

            “Can we share a room?” Dean pleaded.

            John raised his eyebrows and made a face. Cas held his breath nervously and glanced down at the floor. When John’s eyes flickered over Cas, he forced a smile and nodded. “If that’s what you two want to do, then go ahead.”

            Dean took Cas’ hand in his own, Cas bristling with anticipation.

            John let his gaze run over the boys one last time before letting a grin spread over his lips. “You should see your faces right now. You all look like kids in a candy store,” he laughed, the boys breaking out into smiles as well. “All right. Go ahead and check it out.”

            Cas, Dean, and Sam immediately took off, running along every hall and peeking behind every door. They were amazed by everything that the bunker contained. It had a kitchen and multiple rooms for them to potentially sleep in.

            Eventually, they came to a stop in the hallway, panting breathlessly. “Should we choose our rooms now?” Sam suggested, his eyes widening with excitement.

            “Sure,” Cas nodded, glancing over at Dean and Sam sped down the hall.

            Chuckling in amusement, Dean walked past multiple doors before stopping at a door with the number eleven printed on it “How about here?”  


            Cas nodded. “Sure.”

            Dean wrapped his hand around the doorknob, turning it gently. He opening the door, revealing a queen sized mattress with a brown comforter. There was a nightstand on the both sides of the bed and a desk on the left side of the room. A shelf hung right above the bedframe where Cas considered framing some photos that he had taken with Dean on his phone after they left Lawrence. There was also a dark brown chest at the foot of the bed, its contents a mystery to both boys.

            “What do you think?” Dean asked, wrapping his arm around Cas.

            Cas beamed. “It’s amazing…”

            “I know it’s not as great as your room in Lawrence or Bobby’s house, but it’s a lot better than staying in a sketchy motel,” Dean told him, pressing his lips against Cas’ forehead gently.

            Cas nodded. “Should we unpack?”

            “That would probably be a good idea.

 

* * *

 

 

            “This looks nice,” Dean thought aloud as he plopped onto their new bed. They had finished unpacking their belongings; their clothes were hung in the closet and their bags were hidden under the bed. Cas’ books were scattered along the shelf and his journal was placed on the desk. It finally felt like home.

            Cas sighed contently, sliding into bed beside him. He curled up against Dean, resting his head on his chest. “I love it here…”

            He felt Dean smile. “Good.”

            “Hey, guys! Guess what I found?” Sam called from down the hall.

            Cas sat up curiously, Dean following his lead as Sam made his way to the entrance of the room. “What is it, Sammy?” Dean asked.

            Sam held up an old black device. “It’s an old camera. A polaroid.”

            Cas’ eyes lit up. “Really?”

            “It even has film!” Sam added cheerfully as he walked to the foot of the bed, handing the camera to Cas.

            Cas twirled it around in his fingers. “Oh, wow…” he mumbled, his eyes gleaming with interest.

            “Should we take a picture?” Dean suggested, leaning over Cas’ shoulder to get a good look at the device.

            “Sure!” Cas nodded. “Sam, can you take a picture of us?”

            Sam’s eyes widened. “Of course!” He took the camera from Cas and backed up as they got into position. Dean brought his arms around Cas, a wide grin across his lips. Cas leaned his head against Dean’s shoulder eagerly.

            “Three…two…one!” Sam called as he snapped the photo.

            Dean and Cas leapt from the bed, rushing over to Sam. “How did it turn out?” Cas asked impatiently.

            A few moments later, Cas was holding a photo of him and Dean. It brought a smile to his face as he let his eyes drift across Dean, who had the biggest grin Cas had ever seen.

            “I look so weird,” Dean laughed, shaking his head.

            “No,” Cas reassured him. “You look very cute.” He leaned over and gave Dean a peck on the cheek.

            Sam rolled his eyes as he headed back into the hallway, leaving the camera behind.

            Dean’s brought an arm around Cas. “I love you,” he whispered into Cas’ ear.

            Cas smiled brightly, leaning closer to Dean. “I love you, too.”

            “Are you happy here, Cas?”

            Cas nodded his head. “Of course. I’m with you, after all.”

            And nothing is better than being happy with the one you love the most.

            Dean let his eyes drift over Cas as he kicked the door shut with his foot, refusing to break his gaze. Cas was somewhat uneasy; he wasn’t sure what Dean was going to say or do. Cas blinked back at him, taking a shallow breath.

            Dean stared directly into Cas’ eyes, then at his mouth. Dean let his hands slide down to Cas’ waist before shoving him against the wall, knocking the air out of Cas’ lungs. They stared breathlessly at each other before Dean leaned forward and pressed his lips against Cas’ like they had done so many times before.

            Every time they kissed, Cas felt himself rush with emotion. He loved the way kissing made him feel and how perfectly his lips fit against Dean’s warm mouth. He hated it when the moment ended and it was just another memory in his mind.

            Cas let himself melt into Dean’s arms, his knees buckling as his fingers traced along Cas’ bare skin. Dean’s lips traveled down to Cas’ collarbone, making Cas throw his head back in response. Dean took his thumb and placed it on Cas’ chin, tilting it back down so they were looking directly at each other. Cas felt his heart jolt as Dean’s hot breath touched his lips. He swallowed hard.

            Cas could hardly function with Dean taking the lead, countless moans and gasps seeping through his mouth as Dean brought their lips together. He let his hips gently press against Cas, resulting in more repressed cries. “Cas,” he whispered. “Sam can probably hear you.”

            Cas felt his eyes widen in realization, and as he opened his mouth to speak, Dean cut him off by pinning him back against the wall by his wrists. Cas choked back a gasp, making a strangled noise in response as Dean let his fingers slide under Cas’ shirt. Their lips met once more as Dean’s hand trailed along every part of Cas’ warm chest. “Dean…” he whimpered, tipping his head back as Dean’s kisses moved down to his neck. His hands were now resting on Cas’ waist once more.

            “Dean…” he shivered, Cas’ hands drifting up to his shoulders. They were now making out softly, feeling the warmth radiating off each other’s bodies. He hooked his legs around Dean’s waist, their lips never parting as Dean carried him to the bed. Cas pushed Dean down forcefully onto the mattress, pillows falling onto the floor in disarray.

            Cas was hovering over Dean now, his lips barely brushing against Dean’s mouth. He could feel Dean’s hot breath, making his skin tingle warmly. He took a single finger and traced the outline of Dean’s lips, pausing right at the corner of his mouth. Cas leaned in, softly letting his mouth graze along where his finger had just touched. He could feel Dean going limp as he brought his knees and rested them on either side of Dean’s hips.

            And at that very moment, Cas took it all in. Here he was, kissing the guy of his dreams on the bed they would be sharing later that night. If he had told himself a year ago that this would be his life, living alone with Dean and his family, Cas’ old self would have laughed right in his face.

            It was crazy to think that in just a few months, Cas had fallen in love with such an incredible guy like Dean. Although he could be temperamental at times, Dean was irresistible to Cas. He couldn’t resist falling for every little thing Dean did, no matter how subtle it was.

            Dean raked his fingers through Cas’ dark hair, feeling the blood roar in his ears as their foreheads pressed together. As Cas pulled his lips away, he felt Dean’s hot breath against his skin as Cas splayed his fingers across Dean’s chest.

            They stared into each other’s eyes for a few moments, a breathless smile breaking out across Dean’s face. Cas desperately wanted to know what he was thinking at that very moment, exactly what was running through Dean Winchester’s mind right after an amazing make out session like the one they had just shared.

            Dean smoothed Cas’ ruffled hair out with his palm, letting his hand rest on the nape of his neck. Cas watched Dean let his gaze brush across Cas’ facial features, the smile still lingering on his lips. Questions were burning in Cas’ mind, but he forced himself to remain silent so he wouldn’t ruin the moment.

            Dean’s expression was soft and full of love, his lips still moist from the last kiss they shared. Cas drew his tongue across his own bottom lip as he stared back at Dean, sighing softly.

            “What are you thinking about, Cas?” Dean asked, his voice light and tender.

            “You,” he whispered, his gaze flickering over Dean’s chiseled facial features.

            “What about me?” Dean insisted, drawing his hand along Cas’ hair once more.

            “How lucky I am to have you in my life,” Cas told him, a grin spreading across his lips.

            “I’m even luckier,” Dean added, pressing their foreheads together once more. “I don’t know what I would do without you…”

            They shared another passionate kiss before Cas shifted beside him. Dean curled up around Cas, sighing into his chest. Cas turned to face Dean and let his forefinger trace the outline of Dean’s chin.

            “I love you,” Dean whispered, burying his face in Cas’ warm neck.

            Cas let his chin rest on Dean’s head, bringing his arm around Dean and pulling him closer. “I love you more than anything in the entire world,” Cas murmured, his voice muffled by Dean’s soft hair.

            Just like all those times before, Cas never wanted the moment to end.

            And most of all, he didn’t want to let go.


End file.
